Page 72 of Until Death or Defeat

“Oh, Reina thank fuck you answered. Please tell me you’re not busy.”

“Oh Gigi...I’m sorry. I’m getting ready for something,” she breathes into the phone.

“You’re so busy lately,” I try to say neutrally as I walk to the dresser and try to find something to change into.

“Yeah...I’m sorry. I just feel like Michael and I are in a fun bubble right now, you know? We’ve been bonding so much and...” she keeps going on, but I find myself quietly following along with a mocking opening and closing of my mouth.

So sue me.

Michael is perfect on paper. Reina loves him and she’s so happy but God...all she does since dating him is be with him and talk about him. It’s only gotten worse since my wedding.

“Gigi?”

“Yes! Sorry, I was listening. The best part was when Michael pulled the moon closer to Earthjustfor you.”

She laughs at my sarcasm. “Okay, okay. I get it, I rambled. But I’m happy. And he occupies my time a lot so I know it isn’t the same.”

“Well I haven’t heard from you and...I have a lot going on. Like, life leveling shit.”

“Honestly, I want to see you but I can’t miss this. Oh! Sorry gotta go!”

I look down at my phone in disbelief that she hung up on me. Seriously? I tell her my life is spiraling and she just doesn’t care? Who the hell am I gonna lose next?

I don’t even notice Artem until he pinches my ass, pulling me out of my head as I turn and slap his arm.

“Jesus, just because we’ve had a few crazy days and had atemporarytruce does not mean you can touch me whenever you want. Don’t get this all...twisted, okay?” I say as I turn my head so I don’t have to see his obnoxiously handsome smile.

“Ah, you keep making up new rules,solnishko. I never agreed to those terms.”

“Well, I’m not in the mood, okay? I’m going to go show up at my uncle’s house tonight and I’m all...I don’t know.”

“It seems like you need a distraction. One only your husband can give you,” he coos as he grabs my arm.

“I...don’t want anything you could give me.” The words tumble out and evenIbarely believe them.

“Would it make you feel better if I just took the choice away from you?” He pulls me closer and spins me, so my back is against his chest, his devilish voice whispering in my ear. “That way you don’t even have to think, don’t have to put onan act for me at all. I don’t mind taking it from you so you can pretend you don’t want it.”

“You’re out of your mind, I?—”

“Shh,” his lips go to my ear, nibbling it as I accidentally go silent.

Why does he have such an effect on me? I think I made a grave mistake being so vulnerable in front of him the last few days.

“Do you know how long I’ve been waiting to take that perfect cunt of yours?”

I feel still as his hands roam me, his gravelly voice in my ear whispering dirty things. If I do that...we will get closer. And closer. And closer. And then, we will change.

Hewill change.

He won’t be the same, and I can’t handle more change. Not from him. I need one person in my life to be who they say they are and stay that way. I don’t need to get attached to him, and need him, and have it change like everything always does in my life.

“We . . . don’t dothat, Artem. We can’t.”

“Then tell me what you need.”

What I need? I need . . .

“I . . . I don’t know.”