Page 51 of Rest In Knotty Pieces

I don’t tell him I already chose a side a long time ago or that I’m playing a precarious game that is so much bigger than they could imagine.

He fades into the trees and disappears. I feel it when he’s gone. It’s like an emptiness in the world.

For another few minutes, I stare at the tent, thinking about the fact that I could easily take care of this. I could make them disappear. But that would risk everything. Five minutes of peace could bring a lifetime of regret.

I shake my head, pushing the murderous temptation away and make my way back to the cabin. When I get there, I don’t go inside; I stand out in the moonlight.

They are changing me. Not twisting me up but pulling back curtains that I have had pulled across the parts of me I don’t want to face yet.

“Are you going to tell me how you know her?”

I sigh and cross to a stone bench and drop onto it. Sage wanders out of the dark and perches beside me, not leaving any space; no, his damn thick thigh is pressed to mine. His scent eases the tightness in my chest.

I want his presence to be distressing.

It’s never been distressing.

Not for one minute.

It’s been temptation itself.

“Is it not enough to ask you to trust me?”

He cocks his head to the side. “For me, yes. For the rest of them, well, they don’t know you like I know you, Aaron. So, give me something. How do you know her? How did she know you were stabbed?”

I snort a laugh and give in to the temptation, twisting until I’m facing him, and running my fingers through his hair until I’m cupping the base of his neck. “Isn’t it obvious? She was there.”

“How? Where? When? Why didn’t you tell me you almost died?”

I press my cheek to his.

“Don’t show me your eyes; they make me weak,” I whisper. I clear my throat and speak louder. “I didn’t tell you because you didn’t need to know. I was alive. About a year ago is when it happened. I saved her.”

I stop talking, falling into the memory, the shock and horror of finding her there. How I’d screamed inside.

“He came out of nowhere. We fought. I told her to run. I was dumb and got stabbed, she ran. It’s all very simple.”

“Except where has she been for the last year? How did no one know you were injured?”

“Daega knew. He stayed at the hospital with me, threatening anyone who looked at me the wrong way.”

Sage is quiet, then he pulls back so he can see my face.

“Okay, so you think that what happened to her-”

“Was the worst of the worst? Yes. I don’t know how bad it is, but it’s bad enough to destroy her psyche, to shatter her inner walls. Look at her. Have you seen anyone that traumatised before? Merle will never be able to accept us, Sage. She can’t be a normal omega. She needs to be safe and away from the violence that we live with.”

Sage blows out his cheeks. “I think we’re exactly what she needs.” He gets up and slaps a hand on my shoulder. “Come have dinner. I kept a plate warm for you.”

I stare up at him. Has anyone ever kept a plate warm for me? Has anyone cared where I was?

I feel like I’ve been fighting for a thousand years, I’m tired, and so, I don’t resist his siren’s call. He leads me inside and down into the bunker. In the kitchen, he hums a happy little ditty as he warms up my food before setting it and a glass of wine in front of me.

He sits down and rests his chin in one hand while he watches me.

“You’re not sleeping.”

I pause in my chewing before reluctantly shaking my head. “Spying on me now, Sage? I’m fine.”