Page 211 of Rush

He turns. Hand on the door handle.

Then, low, “You were mine first.”

The door clicks shut.

And perhaps he’s right. Maybe it’s because he’s my first, maybe it’s because despite all my denial, he still holds a very large part of my heart.

Will I ever truly be rid of him. Or has he imprinted so deeply into my bones?

I crumple to the floor, knees buckling beneath me. Shaking. Hollow.

I press my fists to my chest desperate to hold myself together. But the sobs rip through anyway, tearing me apart. My throat burns. My face floods with heat, salt and grief.

If I see him again—I don’t know if I’ll survive it.

The door flies open. I flinch. But the black combat boots are all the confirmation I need. Luca.

I look up at him, when his eyes widen. He crosses the room in two strides, dropping down.

“Elena—are you okay? Are you hurt?”

He scans me then the room.

“Get me out of here,” I whisper. “Please.”

Luca doesn’t ask questions. He just nods and lifts me to my feet, wrapping an arm around me like a shield. I’m strung up like a doll on display, shrouded under a hoodie Luca threw over me haphazardly, trying to keep me whole. We move fast,cutting through the back hallway, past Mark and Kylie who look concerned and confused.

“We’ve had a breach,” Luca says by way of explanation. They don’t stop us.

I press my face into his chest, not sure I can handle their reactions.

The cold night air hits me and I flinch. Like I’m waking up from something.

In the car, I curl into myself. The seat swallows me whole. Chris sits silently in the front seat and Luca glances up in the mirror, jaw locked.

“I’m so sorry,” he mutters. “I stepped out for two minutes—line was insane—I didn’t think he’d actually—fuck.”

“It’s not your fault,” I croak.

Because it’s not.

Even if he’d been there, Alex wouldn’t have listened.

We hit a red light. The car hums quietly.

“Don’t be hard on yourself Rossi, he should have never gotten past the venue security, I’ll be having a word with them about that,” Chris says.

He’s right, he undoubtably used his star power to charm his way in, just like he’d done with me.

Luca exhales—long and slow—like he’s trying to release the anger, the shame, the helplessness.

And I stare out the window, throat raw, heart scraped open.

Too many ghosts.

Too many what-ifs.

And no Broderick to drown them out—he feels so far away he might as well be on another planet. I know if I called him, he’d drop everything just to be here, to be with me. But it’s not soon enough.