Page 21 of Sincerely, Butterfly

Skittles lands on my windowsill, and I get up from the bed, smiling like a damn idiot. “You did good, baby boy,” I coo, giving him a head scratch. “Did you hear? They want me. They actually want me. They haven’t been protecting me because of who my dad is, but because ofme!”

He lets out a clicking sound, making me laugh. “I know, right? How fucking exciting is this? But we have a problem, Skittles. They think they can’t have me. That I’m too pure,” I scoff at the absurdity.

Skittles squawks. “I know, right? Me? Pure? If only they knew.” I look around the room, eyes landing on the various, different photos I have pinned to my wall. All of them that I’ve taken from a distance.

You know, when you like a band, a singer, sometimes even an actor so much that you fill your walls with posters of them?

Well… for me, it’s them, and instead of posters, it’s printed photos I’ve taken while stalking them.

“I just need to show them that they’re wrong. That they can have me any way they want. I need to prove to them that they won’t scare me off by showing me who they really are. How? I have no idea, seeing how I can’t seem to speak more than a few words when I’m around them and blush like the innocent girl they think I am. Ugh! I did this to myself, didn’t I, Skittles? I have no one to blame but me for letting them assume this. And now I’m going to have to prove them wrong.”

I really have no idea how I’m going to do that, but I’ll come up with something. I have the next two months to figure it out. They’re leaving next week for summer vacation just like they do every year.

I’m not sure what they do and where they go when they leave, but I know it has something to do with work.

I have both loved and hated the summer while growing up. Loved it because I got to be away from the people I despise more than anything in this world for a whole two months. Hated it because they’re gone, and I can’t spy on them, which leaves me to rely on past footage that I’ve saved to get me through those times.

And yes, by ‘through those times’, I mean I use them to get off. It’s my own personal porn.

“We need to celebrate,” I tell Skittles. “How about a dance party!?”

Sleep sure as hell isn’t going to be something I get tonight. I’m way too wound up now. The adrenaline coursing through my veins has me practically vibrating.

I grab my phone and hook it up to my Bluetooth speaker, pulling up my playlist with a grin as I pick the song.

With a smile on my face, a delighted high courses through my body, and I snatch my hairbrush off my dresser and turn toward the nearest photo of all three of them together that I have pinned to the wall.

Letting out a sigh, I shake my head as I look over the three ofthem. “You stupid, sexy boys. You have me all wrong. So. Fucking. Wrong. And I can’t wait to show you just who I am.”

Liquidby Ashnikko starts playing. Running a finger over their faces, I sing the lyrics ‘I wanna wear your skin’, then sing along with the next line as I dance around the room over to another photo.

I keep doing this, moving from photo to photo as I really get into the song, performing as if I were on stage and this was a private show just for them.

When the main chorus hits, I rush over to my bed and climb up, bouncing as I sing the first line, ‘I'm way more wicked than you thought’beforedropping to my knees for the next part that goes ‘so sick and twisted’dramatically before adding‘so hedonistic’. At the words ‘Oh my god’,I get back on my feet and jump off my bed.

Knowing every lyric by heart, I dance around my room, singing to each photo, as if they're right here in front of me.

I keep going, vibing with the song right up until the end. Leaning over my dresser, I get close to another photo of the three of them walking down the street. Sylas is laughing, and Wesley is suppressing a grin while Jasper looks as unimpressed as always.

With a sigh, I finish the song, singing the second last line ‘fuck me roughly and then treat me soft’,wishing that was our reality as the song comes to an end.

“Soon, boys. Soon you will be mine,” I mumble to the photo. “Soon, I will show you exactly who I am. I won’t let you use any more excuses as to why I can’t be yours. You’ve been mine for years now. It’s about time that it becomes the other way around.”

CHAPTER

FIVE

NOLA

It’simpossible to keep the smile off my face as I walk into school the next day. As I walk down the hallway, people stop what they’re doing to do a double take, and I’m quick to realize my extremely good mood just might be an issue.

I guess seeing me with anything but a resting bitch face is something to gawk at.

Normally, I’d scowl if I saw someone openly staring at me because I hate attention, but I’m in too good of a mood to care.

I mean, hello? I just found out the three men I’m madly in love with love me too.

Okay, so love might be pushing it, but they do want me.