Page 103 of The Love We Deny
“Can we please go inside?” I say, over both of them, before our family becomes the neighborhood spectacle.
Nobody listens.
Jess is yelling at Will, and he’s arguing back nonsense, and I learned a long time ago that once they get going, you can’t get them to stop, and you can’t come between them.
Unless you’re their dad.
“Kids.” Frank’s booming voice cuts through theirs, silencing them the way he has for their entire lives. “Inside. Now.”
Everyone goes into the kitchen, and I can hear Will and Jess starting again, but I hang back, turning to the kids. “Addie. Ollie. Upstairs.”
“But Dad—”
“I’ll come up and talk to you in a minute, but right now, I need you to go upstairs. Please.”
Addie looks at me, then at Will across the room, and the smile that was on her face settles into something more serious as she starts to realize the gravity of the situation. “Okay,” she says. “Come on, buddy.”
She steers Ollie toward the stairs, and then it’s the five of us, and the kitchen feels very small all of a sudden. Jess has her arms crossed, and Joyce looks pale. Frank is clearly uncomfortable, not making eye contact with anybody.
“Okay,” Jess says into the silence. “What just happened?”
Will shrugs. “I kissed him.”
Everyone looks at him.
“What can I say, I have a thing for mustaches.” I can see exactly what he’s doing. Protecting me from the fallout. “Figured I’d shoot my shot.”
He winks at me.
“Honey, you can’t—” Joyce starts.
“You never told us you were interested in…” Frank trails off, not able to say the word.
Will tilts his head, ready to argue over his fake story. “I wonder why. Look how you’re reacting.”
“We’re not upset about that,” Joyce says.
“We’re upset cause you kissed yoursister’s husband,” Frank adds on, raising his voice now.
“Why?” Will asks with a shrug, casual as anything. “They’re separated.”
“We are not separated—”
“You LEFT—”
“That doesn’t mean—”
“I kissed him,”I nearly shout, getting their attention. Everyone turns to look at me, Will shaking his head as if to say ‘don’t do it’, but I am. Consequences be damned. I’m not letting them take it out on him when I started it.
“I kissed him,” I say again. “And it wasn’t the first time.”
No one says anything, so I explain. “I developed feelings for Will. And when I told him how I felt, he rejected me.” I glance at Will, and then I don’t look away because it’s easier to say it to him than anyone else.
“He said no, and I pushed until he agreed to go out with me. But I was a horrible boyfriend and—”
“Boyfriend?” Jess interrupts, her voice a few octaves higher than usual.
“Yes,” I say, even though I’m sure that ship has sailed.
