Page 89 of Code Bound
CHAPTER27
LOCKE
When I wake up from a much-needed rest, it’s to the blissful warmth of Vesper in my arms. In our sleep, we’d wrapped further around each other until we’re a tangle of limbs I don’t want to pull from. Her skin is warm against mine as I crack my eyes open the barest amount to get a look at her sleeping form. She has her face pressed against my chest, her warm breath tracing over my skin and making me consciously aware of our state of undress. Her arms are wrapped around me with her hands balled into fists at my back. One of her legs is thrown over my hip, but the other one is between mine. Her thigh is resting right against my?—
Nope. I can’t think about that or else this is going to get a whole lot more awkward, and I’m not ready to end this prematurely.
In Dross, I’d been an asset to Mother Remainder. I’d been a very good Spine Jacker, but that’s not why Mother Remainder kept me around. She called me “pretty,” usually right before she’d beckon me to her chambers. When Mother Remainder beckons you, there’s no refusal, not unless you wanted to die. I may have been pretty to her, but I wasn’t worth anything more than anyone else. One step out of line, and I’d have been dead.
At first, I’d rebelled against it. I’m stubborn, and cocky. I know that. So, when Mother Remainder had claimed me, I’d thought pissing her off would give me some sense of pleasure. I’d gone out when I wasn’t working and found a woman in one of the taverns. She’s been cute, sweet even. One of those rare people in Dross who were still wholly optimistic despite the shithole we lived in. It hadn’t been hard to convince her to sleep with me. I’d wanted to get a taste of that optimism, something I lost long ago. The sex had been normal, cozy, and uninspiring, but my intentions wasn’t to marry the woman. I was simply trying to stick it to Mother Remainder, let her know that she might “own” me, but she could never “control” me fully.
I’d been wrong.
There are a few raised scars on my back from that instance alone, but those were nothing compared to the sight of that optimistic woman being strung up before me. Mother Remainder had been pissed, and I’d been forced to watch that optimism turn to fear. I’d watched the light in her eyes go from bright to nothing as she’d bled out before me. Mother Remainder had forced me to service her while the woman’s dead body hung before me. I still remember the drip, drip, drip of her blood . . .
I haven’t been with anyone else since then. As much of an asshole as I am, I couldn’t subject another innocent person to that punishment. After years of belonging to Mother Remainder, I’d started to wonder why I even stayed. When I’d passed the Harrow Gate that day, the rest is history. I’d gotten in line.
I never thought the woman standing in the line next to me that day would become so important, so fast.
I’ve survived on my own for so long, I don’t remember what it’s like to rely on someone. Vesper isn’t like that. She’s had Dox throughout her life, and when the Harrow Gates open again, I know her friend will do whatever it takes to get through. It’s what Vesper would do, and I doubt she’d be such close friends with anyone who wouldn’t do the same. Part of me is afraid of that day. Once she has her friend, will she even want me around? Will I have served my purpose?
“Yes,” Cipher says.“Your purpose is temporary.”
I scowl.Is that because she’s thought that or just because you don’t like me?
Cipher sniffs. “She does not know that Bone Breakers make terrible allies.”
What makes me so terrible?I ask.
Cipher laughs, the sound sultry in my head. “Shall I list every reason or just the most obvious ones?”
My arms tighten around Vesper.You know, you’re a real asshole. I’m just . . . I’m trying to keep her safe.
He hums. “And who is to protect her from you when the time comes?”
I don’t answer because I don’t have an answer. I’ve done terrible things to survive—I know that—but surely, Vesper has, too. You don’t survive in Dross without taking food from someone else’s mouth a few times. I’ve killed for food. I’ve felt the bone-deep hunger when your stomach screams for nourishment, but you can’t bring yourself to fight for it. I’ve considered Softlock before. But that’s just Dross. We’re all slaves to the system there.
Here, I want to be something more. Stronger. Bigger. More powerful.
So no one can control me ever again.
Despite that, I know I would never intentionally hurt Vesper. We came into this place looking for something better, and it’s clear we can’t find that “something better” by acting the same way we had in Dross. She’s teaching me that with every bit of empathy and loyalty she shows. She could have left me a few times over. It’s been a long time since someone has relied on me, since someone looked at me the way she looks at me, since someone has gone through great lengths to watch my back.
I like it. And I really don’t want to mess it up.
You planning on talking to me more often now or just when she’s about to die?I ask Cipher in my head, relishing the warmth of the body wrapped in my arms.
“Only when necessary,” he answers loudly for both of us to hear. “I still do not like you.”
Vesper stirs in my arms at the sound of Cipher’s voice and I curse the system for cutting my pleasure short. I’d have liked to hold her for just a while longer.
She stretches and I give her enough to space to do so in the sleeping bag, but her leg brushes my cock. I can’t stop the reaction. Immediately, it hardens, all my careful movements to avoid it going out the window. I know she feels it. There’s no way to avoid it. Her eyes flicker open, those pretty brown orbs crashing with mine as I try my best to pretend it’s not happening.
“Good waking,” I murmur, a flush starting to crawl along my chest and up my throat.
Her lips curl up devilishly. “Good waking.” Her arms snake back around me as she buries her face against my collarbone again. “You’re so warm.”
“Absorb as much as possible,” I remind her. “We’re about to be very fucking cold again.”
