Page 47 of Clinically Bewitched
Explaining to everyone how the universe had brought us together.
How we were soulmates.
How this was destiny.
I unbuckled my seatbelt.
She did the same, gathering her crystals and tarot cards and hemp bag.
“This is so exciting,” she said. “I can’t wait to see where you live. Wherewelive. Is it a house? An apartment? Does it have good energy? I bet it has good energy. You seem like someonewho would choose a place with good energy, even if you don’t realize that’s what you’re doing.”
“It’s an apartment,” I said. “And you’re not staying there.”
“Where am I staying?”
Good question.
I hadn’t thought that far ahead.
“A hotel,” I said.
“That seems wasteful. We’re married. We should probably stay together. It’s more practical.”
“We’re getting an annulment.”
“The universe will—”
“If you say ‘the universe will decide’ one more time, I’m going to lose my mind.”
She smiled. “Okay. I won’t say it.”
“Thank you.”
“But it’s still true.”
I closed my eyes and counted to ten.
Then twenty.
Then thirty.
It didn’t help.
We deplaned.
Walked through the terminal.
Collected our bags; hers was a duffel bag covered in patches that said things like “TRUST THE JOURNEY” and “COSMIC VIBES ONLY.”
And then we were outside.
In Hartford.
Forty minutes from home.
Forty minutes from my carefully controlled, perfectly ordered city.
With my wife.
