Page 1 of The Girlfriend Clause
Chapter 1
Andrea
“So let meget this right.” The voice on the end of the line spoke slowly. “You want me to knock on the door and look inside, but you don’t want me to deliver the food?”
“Yes, that’s right.” I nodded, trying to sound like this was perfectly normal. “You can have the food.”
“Sell it, darling, I believe in you,” whispered James loudly behind me, his hands pressed together in the semblance of prayer. “Imagine he’s one of your clients.”
“I can keep it?” The Uber Eats driver’s tone was cynical.
“Exactly,” I said. “Take it home and eat it yourself. Or throw it in the bin. I don’t care. I added a ten-pound tip either way.”
“What? But … why?”
“Fuck, you’re going to have to tell him.” James groaned. It did sound like some sort of scam. Maybe a mystery shopper, hired to find drivers who could be bought off.
“Look, I just want you to tell me who answers the door. My boyfriend is meant to be away for the weekend, but I thinkhe’s at home…” I looked at James for help. This was nothing like doing a sales pitch to a doctor.
James grabbed the phone.
“It’s all fine. Don’t worry”—he paused and glanced at the screen—“Baz. She just needs to know if he has a woman there. Worst-case scenario, check out what cars are parked in the driveway. And for the love of God, do not mention the Uber account name. Can you please, please do this for us?”
The line went silent. James scrolled briefly, then tapped the screen.
“I’ve increased the tip to twenty pounds,” James said firmly, like he was negotiating a contract.
“Okay then,” Baz replied after a beat. “I’m in line at Roti King right now, but I’ll let you know once I’ve dropped by your… er… the place.”
“Baz, you’re amazing. Thank you.” James beamed, then hung up.
“Twenty pounds? That’s… like… twice the cost of the beef rendang,” said Eliza in horror.
“Cheaper than a private investigator.” I reached for my sauvignon.
“And now, we wait.” James leaned back into my squidgy sofa and stretched his arms above his head. “A moment of goddamn genius, Andrea. I’m impressed. Mildly unhinged, but whatevs.” He threw the phone onto the coffee table and yawned. “Ten pounds says he’s there with the pink-haired waitress from the Banana Store. Predictable loser.”
“Not a chance I’m dropping another ten pounds on top of what I’ve already spent on this tonight,” I said sullenly.
James fixed me with a look. “Hopefully you’ll be dropping a six-foot wastrel with a wandering eye and uncanny ability to avoid work and cleaning products.” He raised his glass tomine. “That’s worth a lot more than twenty quid and a beef rendang.”
I chinked my glass against his half-heartedly. “I suppose.”
It was all well and good catching my boyfriend cheating, but it didn’t feel like the victory James seemed to think it would be. It was hard to believe I might have done it again. First Mark, then Jarod. Now Rudy.
Why couldn’t I choose a man who’d be faithful tome?
“Trust me, it’ll be worth every penny,” he continued, catching my expression. “You need to move on from this loser man-child obsession.”
He had a point. Not only was Rudy a suspected cheater, he’d also recently almost set my apartment on fire when he’d smoked half a bag of Khalifa Kush and fallen asleep on this very sofa, leaving a burning candle on top of my new Bose speaker. Thanks to Rudy’s cavalier attitude toward my possessions, we now had no music. The TV news babbled mindlessly in the background instead.
“You remember when he threw your speaker out the window?” asked Eliza, helpfully, as she flicked through the pages of her law book. Sometimes I felt as if my younger sister could read my mind. It could be quite annoying.
“I remember, yes.” I frowned. “I should send him an invoice… for the Uber Eats and the speaker.”
“Twat,” said Eliza, a chewed biro lid half hanging out of her mouth. She scribbled some notes in her exercise book without looking up. “More wine please, James.”
“Ooh, Novexia!” James pointed at the TV, his eyes wide. The blue-and-white company logo appeared on the screen, next to a stock image of a medic tending to a patient in an emergency room. Text scrolled at the bottom of the screen.UP NEXT: UK Pharma Start-Up Novexia in Acquisition Talks. Buyer Not YetNamed.
