Page 177 of First in Line
I tighten my fist and bring it to my chest, where my heart seems to have awakened from its slumber. My voice is stuck in my throat, and the words I want to say feel jammed in it.
I want to be near him, too. But I don’t know how to either. It doesn’t feel right. Nothing feels right anymore.
When I haven’t answered for a moment, he gives up with a sigh. His forehead moves away from me. He lays a kiss where it just was, and whispers, “I love you, princess.”
Still unable to form words, I let him leave without answering. Once again, my sharp edges hurt him. Another deep cut that’ll never fully heal.
We need to stop hurting one another like this. We have to. Hand in hand, we can walk out of this dark and cold tunnel.
The problem is, I’m not sure there’s light at the end of it.
“Perfect, Mrs. Carter. I’m glad we finally figured out the main bedroom’s layout. Now, if you’ll look at these new floor plans for the kitchen. I’ve also made a few renders, so you can envision it better.”
She takes the printed plans from my hands as I open the proper files on my laptop and angle it toward her. She looks at the plan, then the renders, and sighs. “No, it still isn’t right. It’slacking a certain…je ne sais quoi. It feels wrong and not well-arranged.”
I have to fight my hardest not to let my frustration show. At this point, I’m pretty sure we’ve gone through every kitchen arrangement possible. It’s the eleventh plan I’ve made for her, and it’s getting harder and harder to find new ideas.
She’s one of those people who let the smallest amount of power go to their head, and she’s been a pain to work with. I’m tempted to pass the project on to Cynthia, but she’s got her own workload to handle. And it’s my biggest project to date, which remains exciting despite how difficult Mrs. Carter has been.
“I’ll work on it some more,” I say with a professional smile. “Should we look into the garden? The landscaper sent me a few options. They’ll need to start working on it soon, before winter sets in.”
“Yes, sure.”
Those are a hit in comparison, and she actually struggles to pick one, loving all three options. Maybe I should ask them to design the kitchen. It would likely save me days of work.
“Well then, that’s all for today,” I say when she’s settled on one. Of course, it wasn’t the one I tried to veer her toward. “I’ll let you know when I have new plans for your kitchen.”
“Thank you.”
She doesn’t move to stand up, visibly wanting something. Before I can ask her what it is, she leans in a little to say, “Can I ask you a question?”
Here we go …
It’s been a little over two months since I got back to Colorado. For a few weeks, I felt like a circus attraction, from journalists knocking on my door to strangers stopping me in the street. Even my friends didn’t know how to handle it, treating me differently than they did before. Eventually, though, things died down. People assumed Jax and I weren’t back together after all,and that day we were spotted together was just another one of Jackson’s flings—with an ex, this time.
It’s the first time I’m seeing Mrs. Carter in person, though. I do my best not to deal with her like this because I’m always worried I’ll let my frustration show, somehow. But she insisted on coming in today, which I wasn’t sure why. Seems like she wanted some intel.
“Sure,” I say, pretending I have no idea where this is going.
“Is it true? What they say about you and the driver?”
I take in a deep breath, never parting from my rigid smile. “It is,” I confirm. There’s no point in denying it.
Her eyes light up with excitement. “Is that why you were away this summer?”
“It is, yes. Sorry about the delays.”
“It’s fine. The contractor wasn’t available, anyway. Did you follow him around all summer?”
An idea sprouts in my mind. “Uh, yes. He also took me to his house in Italy. Absolutely gorgeous, renovated by a famous European architect. You should have seen his kitchen…”
“Was it beautiful?”
“It was flawless. Come to think of it, the arrangement would work perfectly for yours.”
“Really?”
“Would you like me to show you?”
