Page 89 of The Dragons' Healing Mate

“What? Why do you think that?” I kept my words low and quiet, afraid to spook him, and came around to the front of my desk.

There was something so broken about his expression. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but he looked truly distraught. I hadn’t spent much time with the man, but this didn’t sit rightwith me. He was too worked up. Whatever it was, it had Tanner flailing and going without sleep, if the physical signs were any indication. The dark circles under his red-rimmed eyes, the slow, sluggish movements.

“Are you worried about the baby? I assure you, everything is going well,” I said, reaching out to lay a hand on his arm. “All Celia’s visits have shown that everything is progressing just as it should. You don’t have to be?—”

Tanner yanked himself back, shaking his head over and over, his eyes not meeting mine. “No! That’s not it.” He looked up at me now. My blood turned to ice. He was so determined, so set on whatever path he was walking. That wild gaze made it hard to swallow, alarm bells ringing in my head.

What the hell is going on? I’m a healer. Why the hell…? Shit, should I call out for the guys? Maybe… maybe I can reason with him.

“W-why do you think you messed up?” I asked, slowly starting to shift to the side, hoping I could make it to the door. I needed backup; maybe Ma or one of the Alphas.

Tears gathered in the corners of Tanner’s eyes, and my stomach twisted into knots. Something bad. Whatever it was, it was so,so bad. Dragons weren’t the most emotional in the first place. So to see someone like Tanner, who was usuallyextremelyreserved, this worked up had panic humming at the edge of my mind.

When he dropped to his knees in front of me, I flinched, unsure what to make of it.

Tanner’s voice was hoarse as he began to ramble off his story. “I did what he told me.Solong ago. Many, many years… but it’s all so fresh in my mind. I’ve never stopped thinking about it. But he told me to! My Alpha gave me a command, and I followed through. I had to. Ihadto… Even though I didn’t want to.”

I took a second before answering. Sometimes, because I got close to people as a healer, patients used me as an unofficial therapist. Was that happening now? Tanner needed to confess something, and I was his best option?

“Whatever you did, it was under orders. It’s not your fault,” I pleaded, trying to calm him down.

Occasionally, dragons were compelled to follow their Alphas’ orders. It was an invisible tug that forced them to do their bidding. Most Alphas were extremely careful about how they used it, about which commands they gave, because it could be excruciating to refuse—in both body and mind.

“No. There’s no forgiveness for me,” he said, shaking his head as his face dropped to the floor again. “I did it.Idid. I should’ve fought harder… No matter the pain. Haven’t stopped thinking… thinking about it.”

Fear clawed up my spine. Tanner was on edge, he was crumbling. I didn’t know what to do. I wasn’t trained for this sort of thing, and… he scared me. As strange as that was to admit right now, I was scared. Everything Tanner was doing felt off, as if he were on the brink of snapping. My mind churned, trying to understand why it wasmehe needed to say all this to.

Keep him calm, Rowan.I shifted again, trying to get closer to the door.Keep him calm.

“Of-of course there’s forgiveness. Look at you—you’re about to have a family. Ababy. Whatever happened, it’s done now. It’s in the past. Your future is so bright.”

He shook his head, tears now flowing down his face. “You don’t understand! I refused to follow his order…again.”

I reeled back. He’d saidagain. As if the order was given mere moments ago. How could that be possible? He said it was years ago.

It wasn’t any of my guys who caused this—They hadn’t been the horde Alphas for long.

Shaking my head, I glanced through the still-open door. The den wasn’t far away. “You’re not making sense, Tanner. How did you refuse it again? Did Bastian ask you to do something?”

He shook his head, his entire body following the action.

Keeping my voice gentle, I paused as Tanner twitched. “I can’t help you if I don’t know what’s going on.”

Tanner looked up, meeting my eyes head-on, so bloodshot and wide. “Years ago, Alpha Cyrus gave me a command”—he stared at me, not blinking or moving—“and I followed it. I did it. By myself. It hurt too much to say no. I just wanted it to stop. To stop hurting so damn bad. But I didn’t want to. It haunts me. He threatened my parents. I regret following his command. Every day, I regret it more and more. And now a baby! A baby that’s possible because ofyou!”

“But you don’t have to follow him anymore.” I was shaking now, too, instinct telling me to get out of the clinic as fast as I could. “He’s not Alpha anymore. Bastian and the others are.”

“You think that matters to Cyrus?!”

I jumped, heart thundering in my ears. “I… What did he command you to do? You said no, right? W-we’ll, tell the Alphas. They know that Cyrus can be unreasonable. They’ll understand that you were compelled—an Alpha’s command and power is hard to deny. They’ll know it was really him.”

“No.” Tanner shook his head, sniffing. “They’ll kill me. Hell,Cyruswill kill me.”

“It can’t bethatbad?” I moved closer to the door again. I was so close now, almost free.

“I thought I could pretend it didn’t happen”—kneeling, Tanner rounded in on himself, getting so small—“but Cyrus insists. He’s threatened to hurt Celia and the baby. I-I don’t want to do it. I said no.”

“Okay, but that’s a good thing,” I tried to argue. “The Alphas will see how much courage that took.”