Page 85 of The Dragons' Healing Mate

“Not a bad idea.” Grey exchanged a glance with Orsen, a look that was apparently a conversation without words. “Let’s head in. Rowan, I think you need to…”

Grey jerked his head toward Bastian, and I realized what he was getting at. Bastian was taking this harder than I expected, hewas far angrier. I needed to make this right. It was my mistake, my lie. If we really were going to move forward, weallneeded to do it on the best foot possible.

“Right.” I bobbed my head, and Grey and Orsen walked back to the cabin with Griff. “We’ll meet you up there.”

Silence stretched as I stood near the dock with Bastian. He still stared straight down, fists clenched at his sides. I had no idea what to do or say. After a moment of indecision, I finally got up the courage to move closer, reaching out to slide my fingers around his forearm.

“Don’t do that,” Bastian said in a low voice, jerking backward, but I didn’t let him get away. We needed to do this.

Holding firm, I shook my head. “You can’t go. Bastian, I’msosorry—I didn’t think… I know you’re pissed, and I get it. I just want?—”

He shook his head, taking a step closer to me as I gripped his arm. “I’m not mad, Rowan. At least, not entirely. I was…Fuck, do you have any idea what went through our heads when we found out where you’d gone?”

When our eyes met, I couldn’t tell what I was seeing in Bastian’s. My chest squeezed, and I shook my head, my eyes burning with unshed tears.

“I’m sorry. It was wrong to leave like that. I thought I would be back long before you found out. Not like that makes it right, but…” I dropped my chin, swallowing hard before meeting his stare again. “I made you come all the way out here. I’m sure you’re busy. You didn’t need to deal with all that. I’m sure you have better things to do.”

Bastian scowled, his voice a broken growl. “Better things to—Rowan, do you honestly think there’s anything we put above your safety? For fuck’s sake. I wasn’t angry that you went somewhere without telling us. I wasterrified.”

We were standing so close to one another, I could see every freckle on his face, the dark intensity of his eyes as they focused on me. There was the same layer of irritation and fury that was part of who Bastian was, but there was also so much pain, so much doubt and concern. His eyes were even glassy, and every bit of composure I had fell apart, my free hand going to my mouth.

“Terrified?” I repeated the word, shaking my head, my voice thick. “I don’t… What do you mean?”

It made no sense. None of it did. I highly doubted Bastian could evenbescared. If anything, I assumed he would’ve been happy to get a little space from me. After the handful of times we’d run into each other, after everything with his dragon, I’d assumed he’d want as much distance from me as possible.

“Yes.Terrified,” he said softly, but his eyes drilled into me, now refusing to look away. “You were gone, Rowan, to the very place we’d lost you. And I assumed—Fuck. My brain immediately went to dragon fire and death again.”

“I-I’m sorry. I didn’t… Overme?”

Bastian clenched his jaw again. “Yes, all right. I can’t keep you safe if I don’t know where you are. There’s nothing stopping you from being kidnapped or killed. We wouldn’t be there—again.Iwouldn’t be there.”

“What am I supposed to think? Since I came to North Oak, you’ve acted like nothing would make you happier than seeing the back of me.”

His face cracked, his shoulders sagging. I’d never seen Bastian so tired. “All I want is to keep you safe, Rowan. You have no reason to believe it, I know. Hell, everyone’s told me how good a job I’m doing at communicating that, but yeah.”

I tilted my head, really looking at Bastian for the first time. “I know coming back here is probably painful… I’m sorry I gave you a reason to worry.”

“It isn’t. What made this place painful waslosingyou.” Bastian sank into himself slightly. “Seeing you again was more painful than thinking about the cabin. It reminded me of all the waysIfailed to keep you safe. The waysIfailed you are all I can think about. You were gone, just gone, Rowan. And I’d done nothing.”

Remorse wormed through me, and I thought of what I’d wanted to find here. “But I’m not gone. I’m here, right in front of you. Whatever happened back then… I can’t fix it or change it. I only have now. And the same goes for you. If you wallow in grief, you’ll never be able to enjoy the present. That’s what I think I learned from coming here.”

Bastian’s eyes flared wide, their surface so glassy and reflective. He shook his head, angling toward the lake. His gaze scanned over the surface as the silence hung, and then he sighed. “You know, you once pushed me off that dock into the lake. Caught me completely off guard.”

“I did?” I smiled, a tiny chuckle slipping through at the idea of me being able to sneak up on him.

Bastian smirked slightly. “Yeah. Nix dared you to. You were damn crafty, I’ll hand it to you, but I managed to grab you as I toppled, and we both went in together.”

“Sounds like Nix.” I laughed as I shot a look at the cabin.

Bastian was quiet for a moment, and I could sense the turbulence gripping him. “There are scorch marks on the wall next to the oven, too. Another memory trapped in this place.”

I’d noticed the marks, and my stomach pinched. “I saw them… Are you saying it happened when we were here? I assumed it was kids from town or something.”

He shook his head, the corners of his mouth turning down. “Oh no. That was you. You’re terrible at making popcorn.”

My mouth dropped open. “Excuse me? There is nopossibleway that’s true. I’m fantastic at popcorn making. I refuse to believe that.”

A wolfish smile tugged at his lips. “Well, in your defense… you wereratherdistracted.”