Page 6 of Death of a Mortal

I gave him a half-smile. “I’ll be out back in thirty.”

There was no denying that the release sounded pretty good right now. My mind had been on the fae and the king and my wretched father and electric, hellish sister, and how cruel our situation was for Nella. I wouldn’t mind forgetting all of that for just a little while. I needed to work off some steam. And Fadric was alright. He was easy. He was a good guy, even if he would not be mine forever. Because I wanted everything to do with this town obliterated from my life once I could get myself and Nella out. He knew how much I wanted to get out of Briarstead, and I didn’t think for a second he would stop me or that I would let him be what held me back. This was always temporary.

We had never had the conversation, but it was theideaof him I loved, and I think he knew it. I didn’t think I’d ever actually loved anyone other than Nella.

Fadric shot me a devilish grin over his shoulder as he left the bookshop, tinkling the bell again. His ass looked good in those tight beige pants, so I didn’t feel too bad about the situation I’d just planted myself in.

I spent the next half hour shelving books and thumbing through the few that snagged my attention. I had just flipped openNox Incineramwhen the clock on the wall chimed noon, my lunch hour. After closing the heavy, leather-bound tome, I bounded toward the back exit to find Fadric already waiting for me in the dirty and quiet alley.

He pushed off the wall and smiled at me when I walked out, a slight shiver in the air. It was summer, but the first cool breezes signaling the approaching autumn wafted through the air.

Without a word, he brought one hand up to cup my jaw and the other wound around my waist to pull me in close to him. There was suddenly no distance between our bodies as he pushed me back into the brick wall. He let out a sigh of need that mirrored the ache I felt between my thighs and into my core. I was ready for the pleasure he could offer.

One of my hands found his soft curls as he leaned down to kiss me, our lips meeting in greedy need and expectation. My other hand trailed down the hard lines of his chest and toward the waistband of his pants.

His kisses became more demanding. His tongue pushed against my lips, urging them to open for him, and I obliged. I wanted a distraction—just pure desire, not loving affection.

He grabbed the back of my non-whipped thigh and pulled it up to his waist and lifted me, silently asking me to wrap my legs around him. I allowed my weight to fall into his grasp as I leaned my weight against the wall and lifted my other leg to entwine my ankles around his back.

His lips moved from mine across my jaw and down my neck. I tilted my head back against the brick as I felt the flickering heat build in my chest again, more than just desire. The top button of my white shirt was undone, giving him access to my chest as I ground against him, encouraging him to give me more. He complied and ripped the rest of my shirt open, the buttons flying in all directions.

Damn, I loved that shirt… But as he lowered his mouth to my breasts and I felt his hot kisses on my skin, I didn’t care as much. His fingers found my slip and tore the front in two to gain access to my bare chest.

Oh, no…that was just too much. Something in me snapped, as if I were a thread pulled too tight. “What the fuck, Fadric?!” I yelled.

He pulled back in alarm.

I pushed at his chest to give me space and set my feet on the ground. “You ruined half my clothes!”

The flickering heat in my chest suddenly burned hot, as if it were alive. I couldn’t understand where this burst of anger had come from as I pulled out of his grasp. He just stared at me. I mean, yeah, it was a nice slip, and I only had two in the way of undergarments, but this rage seemed out of body. Out of my control.

Fadric stepped back from me in shock, his mouth hanging open. “I…jeez. I don’t even… What the fuck just happened, Naci? I’ll buy you some new stuff if you’re mad about it. I was just so ready to—”

“I don’t care, Fadric. It’s fine. I’m going home,” I said, seething. Where had this anger even come from?

I wrapped my ruined shirt around me and bolted home, not even bothering to look back or finish my day's work at the bookshop. I stomped into my room—thankfully the monster duo wasn’t home to see me like this, and Nella wasn’t home yet from her job.

I shut the door before sinking to the floor and breaking down into tears that I didn’t even understand. I was just so damn mad that Fadric could so carelessly ruin multiple pieces of my clothing when I had so little. And of course, Mr. Gallant himself offered to replace them. I didn’t need his pity. That was the worst part.

I wrapped my arms around my knees and let the tears fall, because I knew I was alone. No Cassius or Aemilia to mock me, no Nella to witness my weakness. No Fadric to see me…I didn’t know what.

Had I overreacted? I lifted my head and wiped my tears, vowing to apologize to the bookshop owner tomorrow and maybe smooth things over with Fadric if he stopped by. But I found I didn’t really care whether he did or didn’t.

I was detaching quickly from this life, more with each passing day.

I sat there on the hard floor, feeling shame wash over me. Fadric wasn’t a bad guy. He just didn’t understand. But how could he? It’s not like I talked to him about my shitty home life. I didn’t talk to anyone about it, but especially not someone like Fadric whose familywas well off. He didn’t know hunger and suffering as I did, and I didn’t want his charity or his sympathy.

In that moment, I found I felt bad for myself. And I hated that feeling more than shame. I looked around my pitiful little room, and it hit me how powerless I felt to change my life. How very unlike that princess from the book I was. At least she was strong enough to save herself.

* * *

I woke upon my side, lying on the floor. Apparently, I had fallen asleep for a while as the sun had set and evening darkness was falling outside my window. I pushed myself to my feet just as I heard Cassius come in the front door. Well, stumbled more like, so I assumed he was drunk as always on raffle day. And most other days too.

I didn’t hear Aemilia, which meant two things: one, he didn’t win, or else she would be obsessing over how he was going to spend the gold coin, and two, she must be out for the evening with gods knew which boys. They all fawned over her. She was wicked, but she was charming and beautiful with her glossy straight hair, blue eyes, and generous curves. She knew how to get anything she wanted from just about everyone. But I saw through it to the black heart beating in her chest.

My stomach gave a loud rumble, and I realized I had never eaten lunch. I would have to go out to our kitchen for some food at some point, but there was no telling how long Cassius would be out there.

I shed the ripped remains of my shirt and slip, feeling a fresh wave of embarrassment at how I’d treated Fadric. I donned a slightly dirty button up and waited as long as I could before cracking open my door, and I listened hard. No sound, so maybe Cassius had gone to bed. I tiptoed toward the small kitchen—not much more than a sink, a cupboard with a few chipped dishes, and a cold chest for food storage. Another thing we relied on the fae’s magic for was having cold storage to keep our food supply from going bad.