Page 116 of Death of a Mortal

I realized how little I knew about being fae, but I supposed Iwould have to figure some of it out on my own once these cuffs came off.

“Well, cheers to Brom and Neek. May their souls be kicking ass and raising hell in the Vale,” said Bramick, seemingly out of nowhere.

Everyone raised their glasses and sullenly responded with a “cheers” and a nod.

“What happened to them?” I asked Kellan quietly.

“They didn’t make it out of the attack on the castle. They were good soldiers. One mortal, one fae”

My heart dropped. They’d died on the mission to rescue me.

“I know that look. Don’t you blame yourself. They knew the risks. They chose to go anyway.”

My stomach churned with wine and shame, no matter what Kellan said. And I’d bet just about anything that this was part of Drayce’s hatred toward me. Sometimes I’d catch him looking at me like he loathed me, but there were times I caught a look I couldn’t place—like…curiosity or fascination.

Most of the time, however, he didn’t look at me at all. Like now, sitting across the round table from me, staring at his barely touched wine and not saying much.

He was very broody.

The rest of the night passed with much lighter conversation and laughs amongst the crew, and I could tell they were all good friends. I laughed along and listened, mostly absorbing, growing more exhausted with each passing minute.

It was crazy to think I had woken up at dawn for my execution and accepted my death before the sun had even come up this morning. It still didn’t feel real. Maybe that was because of the shackles still around my wrists like cruel bracelets.

I let out a barely stifled yawn, and with that, Aerie barked at everyone that it was time to get to bed. She didn’t need to tell me twice. I hadn’t slept in a bed in months. I had been looking forward to this since I first walked into my new room aboard theHalcyon.

I sat down on the edge of the bed, taking off the shoes I was borrowing from Aerie, but before I could lie down, a soft knock came at the door.

Aerie opened it and then leaned against the frame with her arms crossed. “Need anything?”

I contemplated for a moment. I didn’t, but… “Can you tell me now why you guys came to save me? Drayce seems to despise me, and if he believes I’m on the crown’s side, then why would he risk his soldiers’ lives?”

Her face turned almost sad as she came in to sit next to me on the bed. “He doesn’t want to believe that. He just…doesn’t do emotions well. But he was the one who decided we had to get you out.”

Shocked was an understatement. “What? Why? Because of who my mom was to him?”

She sighed. “I really wish I could tell you everything, but it’s not my place to share. It’s…personal to him.”

“But Drayce even said he doesn’t trust me. I don’t understand.”

She gave a small chuckle with a knowing smile. “I think it’s interesting that you call him Drayce.”

“Well, he told me to. I asked him.”

“I know. That’s what’s interesting. He usually tells everyone to call him Dray.”

It took a moment for those words to sink in, and then she was walking away. She told me good night and closed the door behind her, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

I laid back, and gods, did it feel good. So soft and warm and springy compared to the stone floor of my cell.

Aerie’s words played over and over through my mind, leaving me still confused as to why, if he didn’t like me or trust me, he risked his soldiers’ lives…even losing two of them to get to me. Why did he say he believes me a traitor to the rebellion, after he was the one who said they needed to save me? And why, in the gods’ names, did he want me to call him Drayce when he has everyone else call him Dray?

I couldn’t figure him out. Drayce aside, I couldn’t help but smile as I drifted off into the first good sleep I’d had in a very long time.

* * *

The rest ofthe first week passed much the same as the first day at sea—lounging about the ship during the day, feeling useless while everyone else had jobs and duties, and drinking the unlimited wine with the crew at night. I spent most of the daylight on the deck, thoroughly enjoying the fresh air I had been denied in Ashthorn. We had food that was only marginally better than Halden’s, but it was much better than the slop I’d been fed in the dungeon. Orrin, who was the other air elemental helping move the ship, and also the cook, insisted they needed to “put some meat on my bones” and gave me more food than anyone else at each meal. Drayce gave a rare smile at that comment.

Thinking of Halden made me sad. He was a teenager dealing with death all around him, along with Nella’s loss, just as I had. While there was nothing I could have done to take him with me on a rescue I hadn’t known was coming, I still felt guilty that he was still in Ashthorn.