Page 325 of Tell Me I'm Enough

You’ve always carried your heart like it was something fragile, something that had to be protected. But you were never fragile, my sweet boy. You were tender. And the world confuses the two.

I knew you were different from the first time I laid my eyes on you. You looked at me like you were trying to understand everything already. You always were, way too soon in life.

You were always so in tune with how everyone around you felt growing up.

I remember when you were a baby, and I used to rock you at night and whisper the same prayer over you again and again.

Let him know love.

Let him become love.

Let him never doubt that he is worthy of it.

If you’re standing beside a woman today, a woman who sees you, who makes you want to be softer and more tender, who challenges you, who makes you laugh in that deep way that comes from your stomach, then God answered me.

Love her loudly, Mason.

Love her in the quiet ways too. In the dishes done without being asked, in the way you listen when she talks about something that doesn’t matter to anyone else but matters to her, in the way you hold her when she breaks.

Be the man you needed when you were little. Not perfect, just present, okay?

You will be tempted to shut down sometimes with her, to go quiet, to protect your heart by building walls instead of bridges. You learned that from watching the wrong example.

But you are not him.

You are the boy who used to bring me dandelions like they were bouquets. You are the boy who cried when a bird hit our window. You are the boy who would crawl into my bed after a nightmare and pretend you weren’t scared…just “checking on me.”

Don’t lose that boy.

He is the best part of you.

You know, we don’t ever outgrow the child inside of us. Most people just push that part of themselves down and tuck it away.But we’re meant to keep that spirit alive. It’s a part of what keeps us truly happy in life.

Protect that boy inside of you. Don’t hide him away.

And when you have children of your own one day, hold them tighter than you think you need to. Tell them you love them every single day. Get on the floor and play with them. Apologize when you’re wrong. Let them see you feel.

Break the cycle, Mason.

That will be your greatest legacy.

Not a degree, not a job, not any amount of money you can make.

How you love the people around you will be what sticks with a person long after you’re gone.

I don’t know what your life will look like when you open this. But I need you to know this:

You were my light when I thought I had none left.

And the woman standing across from you today? She is not there to fix you. She is there to walk beside you.

Choose her every day. Even when it’s hard. Especially when it’s hard.

And if you ever look up and see a butterfly land nearby on a day you need reassurance, just smile at me.

I will always be so unbelievably proud of you.

Go build the life you deserve.