Page 303 of Tell Me I'm Enough

I can’t help but feel sad for him, but also proud that he’s finally choosing himself for once. It also kind of hurts that I didn’t know or wasn’t there for him. But…he obviously didn’t want me to be. He didn’t call or text. I know I told him I needed space, but that feels…big. I would have been there for him if I had known.

“Hey,” Lydia says, snapping me back. “What are you thinking?”

I shake my head, trying to keep the emotions back. “Nothing.”

“Lies.”

I stare off for a moment, just thinking. “I didn’t know any of that. He didn’t tell me.”

“I wasn’t sure if you did,” she says softly. “He’s been doing good, though. Bash has been helping him a lot.”

A part of me feels relieved at that. And part of me feels…robbed.

“Helping…how?”

She looks pained, like she wants to tell me, but—

“I—I think maybe that’s all for Mason to tell you. I don’t know if it’s my place to say much more.”

I shake my head, still trying to understand everything I’m feeling.

“He obviously doesn’t want me to know. He hasn’t called once since school. He let me go like I told him I was going to let him go.”

She places her hand over mine, pulling my attention over to her. “I haven’t asked Bash anything because I’ve wanted it to come from you, but…you never really told me what happened between you two.”

“Nothing happened…”

Lydia narrows her eyes at me. “Simone.”

I throw my head back on the couch in defeat and huff.

“We were…just hooking up. That’s all it was.”

“You had sex with Mason?” she whisper-shouts.

I snap my head up, looking around. “Can you be any louder talking about my sex life when my parents are in the next room?”

She slaps a hand over her mouth. “Sorry!”

I let out a laugh, then cover my face with my hands and let out a frustrated growl. “It kind of started at the beginning of last year.”

“A whole year!?”

I slap her arm, trying to get her to stay quiet. “Yes. But…it was just hooking up. I wasn’t ready for anything more after…after Tyler, you know?”

“Stupid Tyler,” she huffs. “I don’t even want to hear his traitorous name.”

I laugh, shaking my head at her. “Yeah…same.”

“So,” she says, still probing. “Was it…good?”

I roll my eyes, smiling. “Better than good.”

Lydia squeals like a little girl, kicking her feet. “I knew something was going on, but I didn’t know it was that deep…” She looks around and smiles. “Orhewas that deep—”

“Lydia!” I hiss, embarrassed.

“Okay! Sorry, sorry. Celibate Lydia is a little jealous right now.”