Page 157 of Tell Me I'm Enough

Lani is sitting on the side of the pool table, sipping on her drink and hyping me up as I whoop Tank in our game of pool.

“How are you this good drunk?” Tank asks when I hit another two balls in at the same time.

I shoot him a wink. “I would have already beaten you ten minutes ago if I were sober.”

“Girl, you wound my ego, I swear.”

“This is payback for beer pong,” I tell him. “And when I win this game, you gotta drink up as payment.”

“Not happening.”

“I think you should just accept defeat,” Lani says, shoving his arm as he goes to hit the ball.

He misses the shot and throws his pool stick down, grabbing her and lifting her off the table.

She squeals. “Tank! You’re gonna spill my drink!”

He places her down and takes the cup out of her hand, drinking the rest of what’s in it.

Lani crosses her arms and pouts. “You owe me a new drink!”

“And you owe me a pool game since you just made me lose.”

“Babe, you lost from the moment you started playing,” I tell him, laughing at the both of them.

He glares over at me. “One day Iwillbeat you, Edwards.”

“I’d love to see you try!”

“SHOTS!” Lani yells, grabbing us all some more drinks.

After enough drinks, the alcohol starts to hit hard and fast. I’m swaying between Lani and Tank, laughing too loudly, and getting whiplash from constantly going between having the best time of my life and remembering all the fucked up shit going on in my head.

I try to stay on the fun side of it all, though, taking more shots, dancing like no one’s around, and having a good time with Lani, trying not to think about how Lydia isn’t here with us.

No Hands by Waka starts playing, and I pull Lani up with me onto the pool table, even though some kids are in the middle of a game.

We’re dancing, laughing, and shouting lyrics like we have no care in the world right now.

I love this feeling. I love not caring.

I feel Lani laugh beside me as she tugs my dress down so I’m not flashing everyone at the party, and a crowd has started to pack themselves into this room, everyone wanting to see the show we’re putting on.

I stop dancing when I see Lani being pulled off the pool table.

“Sandro! You’re such a buzz kill!” Lani shouts at her brother. “How do you end up at every single party I’m actually enjoying?”

I’m quickly distracted when I feel a hand on my leg and look down to see Mason with his hand extended out for me to take and get down.

The sleeve of his shirt rides up, and from this high up, I can see a tattoo peeking out on the inside of his bicep I’ve never seen. I can’t make it out fully, but it looks like little wings, maybe?

“Come on,” he says, pulling my attention back to his face.

I cross my arms. “Why? I’m having fun.”

He cocks his head at me and then, without saying anything else, grabs me at my thighs and hauls me down. Everyone in the room starts booing, and Mason just hikes me over his shoulder and gives them all the middle finger.

“Mason! Put me down. I can walk!”