Page 135 of Tell Me I'm Enough

I look up at him. “Good…I think.”

He gives me a knowing look.

“I’m trying,” I tell him. “I really am. This trip is helping, I think.”

“Good. You know you can always let us know if you need anything.”

“I know, Tank. Thank you.”

I watch over Tank’s shoulder as a girl hands Mason another drink. I’ve lost count of how many he’s had at this point.

I just stay there, talking and dancing with Tank for a while until another girl comes up and starts dancing with us, too.

I wish Lydia and Lani were here. It’s the only thing that would have made this trip better. I don’t have to put up fronts around them like I’m okay. I don’t have to perform. And as much as I’m enjoying myself here…it’s starting to get a little exhausting already.

After what feels like an hour of dancing, I look around the room—everything is starting to blur, and I’m getting pretty dizzy now.

“Where’s Mase?” I ask Tank.

He looks around and shrugs. “No clue.”

“I’m gonna go look for him.”

He gives me a little drunken salute as I walk off.

I push through the crowd of people, looking around for him, but can’t find him anywhere. There are two beach houses we rented for the Gamma house and the Sig house, so I walk over next door to check them.

I really just want to find him so I have an excuse to get away from this party, maybe walk somewhere quieter together.

Don’t really want to be out here stumbling around—tipsy—all by myself.

Partying isn’t distracting me enough tonight, and I know Mason would get it.

After searching the other house, I end up giving up and sitting on the steps with a couple of Gamma girls, nursing the warm drink I’ve been carrying around that I don’t even want anymore.

“Have you seen Mason?” I finally ask them, trying to sound casual.

One of them looks over at me. “Oh—yeah. He went on a beer run a while ago.”

My stomach drops.

“A beer run?” I repeat. “Likewithsomeone, right?”

She shrugs. “No, I think he said he wanted to go alone.”

Anger flares instantly, cutting through the buzz in my head.

He was drinking. A lot. And hedrove.

What the hell was he thinking?

I don’t even say goodbye to anyone. I just grab my things and leave, walking away fast in search of a boy I’m now really pissed at.

I don’t know where I’m even going, maybe to find Tank, or Chase, or…fuck…I don’t know, someone who will know where he is or how to find him.

I stop suddenly when I’m outside, staring at his truck parked in the driveway.

He has to be back then?