Page 138 of Faking it For Summer

Her lower lip trembles, and I run my fingers through my hair.

“I’m a fool. I’m not going to New York,” I say.

“What? No, you have to. You’ll lose your job.”

“And we have literally spent a billion hours talking about the fact that you wanted me to put you first, and you were worried my job would take over, and I told you it was okay. I told you I understood.

“No. We are just figuring us out. I’m not going to rush off to New York and leave you here to pick up the pieces of everything I’d be leaving behind. You don’t deserve that, and I don’t want that.”

“But the job—you’ll?—”

“I don’t care about the job,” I say, laughing, realizing it’s true. “In every single lifetime, I would choose you over a billion dollars.”

“A billion dollars?” Her jaw drops.

I smile as I reach out and touch the side of her face. “You are everything to me. You are worth every shiny silver dollar, every piece of gold bullion, every private island. You are my heart, Mia. I was a fool to even think about going to the airport and leaving you.”

“What made you change your mind? You were dead set. You were going to go.”

“Those two kids.”

“What?”

“Just now, we passed a McDonald’s, and there was a little boy and a little girl, and she was giving him her French fries.”

“Okay … and what? You want to go to McDonald’s and get fries?”

“No. It reminded me of us. Of how we’ve always been.”

“What do you mean?” she asks.

“When we were younger, if you had fries, you’d give me some. If you had ice cream, you’d let me have a lick. If you had a Coke, I’d get a sip. If I was down, you’d make me smile. You’d sing to me. You’d tell jokes. You’d dance. We’d laugh. We’d stare at the sky. We’d swim. We’d read. We’d talk about our dreams and our goals. And you supported me every single time, no matter what.

“You have always been there for me, Mia. You have always supported every single selfish thing I’ve done, and you’ve never asked for anything. And I’ve always had you there, and I’ve always known I’ve had you there. And you’ve been the best friend I could ever ask for.

“And I love you. I love you to the very depths of my being. And that means I have a responsibility to show you that I will always be there for you, come hell or high water.

“You can come to me for anything. You can tell me anything. You can be anything.

“I’m not going to leave you right now. I’m not going to leave you ever.

“You are the best listener I’ve ever met, and you’ve made me a better listener, but I realize I could do better. Because I know I said you could come to New York, and you’ve already told me you don’t want to come to New York, and you don’t want to go to England.

“Coconut Beach is your home. It’s our home.”

I grab her hands and squeeze them. “I’m not leaving, Mia. I’m not leaving you. I’m not leaving Coconut Beach. I’m moving back.” I’m not sure how I ever thought there was a possibility that I wouldn’t move back. Not knowing how badly I missedbeing around Mia, every single day that I’d been away. Coming back to Coconut Beach has been like ripping off a Band-Aid. Seeing Mia every day, being next to her, laughing with her in person. It has reminded me of just how much distance has taken from me. There’s no way I can go back to the friendship that existed when I was in New York.

“You’re moving back?” I can see the genuine shock in her eyes, but then it’s followed by something that resembles hope, and that makes my heart pound. Mia is excited about the possibility of my being back home. She’s not hiding how happy the idea makes her. My heart soars as I stare into her open and trusting eyes. Eyes that have always been a beacon of warmth and comfort to me. “But you don’t want to be here. You love New York. You?—”

“I never loved New York more than being with you, Mia.”

“But you left. You left me behind. You moved on with your life.” My heart drops at her words. Had she really thought that? How could she think I’d moved on with my life?

“I never wanted to leave and stay gone. I have loved you since I was a teenager, and I was scared that it would break my heart, being here, not being able to have you.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I never thought that there was even a possibility of you loving me. And if I’m being really vulnerable and honest with you, a part of me stayed away because I couldn’t face the reality of loving you, wanting you, needing you, and you being with someone else. It would’ve broken me every single day.”