Page 24 of Cruel Kiss

"That I'm a rat," I conclude.

"Yeah. That."

"They're buying it?"

"Some of 'em, yeah." Navi rubs a hand over his face. "It hits home because it makes sense, Ro. You had a big interaction with Todd in front of a room full of bankers. Everybody saw it. And now, Todd's talking to the feds, so the story writes itself. The pakhan's client turns snitch, and drags the pakhan in with him. Then somebody gets curious and looks at the books and sees the mess Pyotr left, all those little red discrepancies, and Lev leans in right then with that perfect timing of his and whispers,You know who leaves a trail like that? A man cooperating. A man leaving tasty little breadcrumbs for his little federal friends."

"And because Lev has Pyotr, he knows exactly where to point."

"Exactly," Navi agrees. "That's the bit that makes all of it work. Lev has the man who knows where every dollar's buried. So it's a compelling pitch. The only alternative is believing you, and why would they do that when you seem to be acting crazy? You turned the guns off and moved a woman and her kids into your life. You gave Lev the window yourself, Ronan."

Well, shit. The bottom line of "Everything you know is fucked" doesn't often get stated more cleanly than that.

Though there's still more to just how shafted I am right now.

"And the mole?"

"Remains a mystery," answers Navi. He leans back into the creaking vinyl booth. "Shit is definitely still leaking out. Nothing big, but trickles lead to floods."

"Any new leads?"

"The list has shortened, but not by that much. Grigor's clean, I'd stake my life on it. Anatoly's too new to care about Igor. Yuri hated the old days too much to run back to them." Navi shakeshis head. "But somebody is yapping. I'll find him, I swear I will. I just need time. Unfortunately, that's the scarcest resource in the business these days."

I look at my cousin across the sticky diner table and think about how long we've been doing this. Since we were boys. Since Igor put a gun in my hand and told me a man who couldn't pull the trigger wasn't a man.

Navi was there for that. For all of it. He followed me out of my father's shadow because he believed I could build something different.

I did, just like he thought I would.

But now, here I am, dismantling it. On purpose. Fucking us all over in the process.

And why?

Forher.

"Say the thing you came here to say," I tell him. "I know you want to. I won't take it personally. You've earned the right to speak your truth."

Navi studies me for a long moment. "Alright," he says. "Straight, no bullshit."

"That's the only way you know how to do things."

He sighs. "You're bleeding out. It's fuckin' ugly to watch, too. Because at any moment, you could stop it. One word to the right people and this whole thing turns around inside a week."

I shake my head. "No."

"Ro—"

"I said I'd hear you out, Navi. I never said I'd agree."

He exhales through his nose. "I'm not saying all this because I want the guns back up and running. I hated that business from the start, you know I did. I'm saying it because I don't want to bury you in the marshes like your father buried men who pissed him off. Just prove to me that you understand what you're doing, man."

That's the problem—I'm not sure I do understand myself anymore.

I only know what my heart is telling me.

"Answer me this," I say. "If we re-launch the business, what happens?"

"The money comes back," he deadpans. "Which is kinda the whole point. 'Crime pays,' you know?"