Page 47 of Aidan (The Doherty Mafia)
But I wanted to show him that I had a rough and hard side to me too.
I sat up. He looked at me with furrowed brows, not quite sure what I was about to do.
I threw one leg over him before he could react and straddled him.
Aidan’s eyes narrowed and I sensed that he wanted to sit up, but I wouldn’t let him.
I grabbed both his wrists and pulled his arms over his head.
I knew he was stronger. He knew it too. He could push me over any time he wanted, but he must have seen the steely determination in my eyes. I used all the strength and weight of my body to keep him pinned to the floor.
I rolled my hips over him, guiding myself over his cock…teasing him by slipping him just half an inch into me and then pulling out.
He got hard again, his breathing became harsh too. His eyes looked heavy and dark. His mouth hung open with desire.
Maybe I was the only girl he allowed to do this to him. I felt powerful. He made me feel powerful and I would use it.
Maybe this was it.
Maybe this was the last time Aidan and I would be together. After this, everything would change. Reality would eventually sink in and he’d realize the full scope of what I was on the verge of doing before he caught me out.
And if the truth about our baby ever came out, I knew he would never forgive me.
This was my only chance of making sure he remembered me as the girl who took him. Instead of the other way around.
Aidan came inside me again. I came hard too, rubbing my clit with one hand while I bounced on top of him and rode his cock. We couldn’t take our eyes off each other.
When I was done, I collapsed on top of him. He wrapped his arms around me, holding me close to his beating heart. I loved being like this with him, feeling the warmth of his body and the strength of him.
He made me feel like anything was possible, even though I knew it was only fantasy.
He gently stroked my hair. It was amazing how he could be so delicate when he wanted. The last thing anyone would expect from a man like him.
I didn’t want to move and I hoped he wouldn’t move either. What would it take to just freeze time?
But with each passing moment of silence—I was reminded of what lay on the other side. He would never tell me how he really felt for me, and a part of me began to believe that I deserved it.
I didn’t deserve his love. I didn’t deserve to have a relationship with him. Heck, I didn’t even deserve his forgiveness or protection—and he offered both to me.
Then why was I allowing myself to fall for him? Why did I come back in here when I’d managed to walk out? Why did we have sex? And again.
Shit.
I had to struggle a little in his hold before he released me. The only way I would stay would be if he told me what I wanted to hear. I still couldn’t get rid of the hope. That maybe if he told me how he really felt, then every problem we had would go away. If only we could admit the truth to each other.
Aidan gave me a questioning look, but that was it.
He wouldn’t say any more.
I grabbed my underwear and went looking for my shoes. I could feel the tears stinging my eyes, filling up swiftly.
I really didn’t want to cry. Especially not after we just had sex.
The last thing I wanted him to think was that I was overly emotional.
“Leah…” He said my name slowly, dragging it out—but there was nothing at the end of that.
He didn’t actually have anything to say.
“I have to go see my mom. I’ll…we’ll…I’m sure we’ll talk. Later.” I couldn’t look at him when I stormed out of the apartment.
I was angry, confused, guilty, heartbroken and afraid. A cocktail of emotions I wasn’t prepared to handle.
I didn’t know what I would do, but I knew I needed to put some distance between us first.
Twenty-Five
Aidan
Before I knew what I was doing—I ended up punching the front door once Leah was gone.
My knuckles were bruised from it and I groaned in pain. The pain felt good, but only for a moment. I needed ice.
Making a makeshift ice pack and using it on my knuckles kept me temporarily occupied for a short while so I didn’t have to think about Leah and what happened between us.
I knew it was a mistake. I shouldn’t have let her walk out of here mad at me. I knew what she wanted to hear, but I wasn’t willing to say the words.
