Page 55 of A Second Chance Summer in Dublin
‘No.’ I shake my head, fully sure.
If I hadn’t met Donal, only a few short weeks ago, I would have fallen back into Logan’s arms here tonight. Only for him to tear me apart again down the line. Logan will only ever love himself. It’s not even his fault. He is a narcissist and only capable of loving himself. Mia had been right all along. Young and immature, I’d been blindsided by him. He’d been my first love. I thought he gave me confidence, but now I see that wasn’t true. I saw what I wanted to see.
‘I know you love me, too.’ Logan suddenly leans in and kisses me hard on the lips.
I pull away swiftly, but just in time to see Donal standing there with my glass of red wine in his hand.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
‘Donal!’ I jump back, forgetting I’m in these towering wedges, and I lose my balance. Logan catches me again. His arms tighten around me.
‘I just brought out your wine.’ Donal smiles, his face unreadable, his voice calm and collected. ‘The cake is coming out, it looks hilarious.’
‘Th-that .?.?. this wasn’t .?.?.’ I feel my face go bright red and untangle myself from Logan’s too-tight embrace. I pull my dress down.
‘Lovely out here, isn’t it? The rubber tree plants are gorgeous. And look, a full moon,’ Donal says looking up into the night sky.
‘Donal, I—’ I start.
Logan interrupts me and steps forward, extends his hand to Donal. ‘Logan.’
‘Nice to meet you,’ Donal says warmly, towering over him.
Logan and Donal shake hands as I watch, speechless. My brain won’t form a sentence.
‘I’m waiting for you to say, “I’ve heard a lot about you, dude,’’’ Logan teases him, still not letting go of his hand.
‘I’d be lying,dude,’ Donal tells him, untruthfully, with a laugh at the end. He pulls his hand away, tucks it into his pocket.
‘Cake? Yeah, can we go back in?’ I manage to move a few steps.
‘Sure.’ Donal nods. ‘But I didn’t mean to intrude, only if you guys are finished?’
‘Oh we’refinished.’ I deliver the line with a tinge of anger and finality.
Donal steps back to allow me to go ahead of him.
‘For now.’ Logan shrugs, smirks at Donal as I walk past him.
Back inside, Logan walks closely behind us, and I grab Donal by the arm of his McQueen shirt.
‘I have to talk to you—’ I stop as the crowd gets louder and people begin clapping and cheering, candles sparkle, I should be over there with Mia.
‘Donal, please let me tell you that was not what it looked like with Logan! He said he still loves me, expected my forgiveness, which I thought I would give, but I didn’t. I didn’t want to. Guess what? I don’t think I love him anymore. I’d just told him as much. But then that guy bumped into me and I fell into Logan and he lost his footing and he kissed me and then I looked up and you were standing there .?.?.’ My words tumble out fast and furious and feeble, my leg muscles tightening. I feel my face turn ashen, and a panic explodes in me; suddenly a knot develops in my chest.
‘Hey. Hey. Hey.’ Donal steadies me with a hand on my elbow, his voice soft. ‘Take it easy, it’s okay, it’s all good. You really don’t owe me any explanation, Grace.’ He squeezes my elbow, oh-so gently.
‘I do! I asked you here – and I didn’t want you to see that, with Logan.’ I stare up at him, my lips quivering.
He looks at me, then his eyes dip. ‘Why not?’
‘I just didn’t. I swear to God, I had an epiphany, Donal, I’ve been convinced that all I wanted was him back. But then I spoke to him, and I realised I don’t. It’s the most liberating thing. It’s .?.?. it’s life-changing for me. And I thought of you and your question, about why I loved him .?.?.’ I gulp for breath. ‘You were right!’ I look over his shoulder now to see Mia standing on the stage in a stunning, white trouser suit, microphone in hand.
‘Take a breath. I get it. I really do. It’s the hardest thing in the world to see a person you once knew so intimately and realise that you are now two separate people. Strangers. It’s tough, your mind plays tricks on you.’ He adopts a soft tone, rich with understanding and acceptance. Mia’s playlist is playing George Michael’s ‘Freedom’.
I stop. Turn to him. ‘It’s more than that. I thought I loved all those things about him, I thought I needed him to be his creative person, so I could be mine. I thought he would come back and I’d feel the way I used to feel about him. But I don’t, and I didn’t .?.?. I don’t know why I loved him so much. To answer your question.’
I really want Donal to know I don’t love Logan anymore.
