Page 39 of Dead Heat
“Silas was right. We’re not at war any longer. We’re warriors, you and I. Soldiers forged in the flames of rebellion. But nowwe sit at tables of educated Magi, and I can no longer ignore the intellectual chasms between.”
“You’ve got more brains in your little finger than half of those delegates,” Kaine spat. “They would run us into the ground quicker than a blink.”
“I disagree,” I argued, though there was little fire left in my voice. “On both fronts. Any one of them could navigate the murky depths of politics more deftly.”
“But what about the people?” Kaine asked. “They adore you, Azrael. If any of those tossers tried to take over as Rudderkin, they’d be ripped to shreds.”
“The people tolerate me at best these days. I’ve asked them to leave home and kin to fight for a better world. Well, now the fighting is over, and we have little more to show for it. Thank the gods that Paradise took us in, or else we’d still be running around the wilds.”
“These dramatics aren’t like you, Azzy,” Kaine said, reaching over to lay a warm hand over my own. “What’s this really about?”
“I speak only what’s on my mind. I’ve always strived to do what’s best for our people, Kaine. This is no different. They deserve a leader who can guide them towards lasting peace, not one who simply awaits the next battle.”
Kaine went quiet at that, the weight of his gaze lingering on me. His hold on me did not lift, however. And that lingering gaze brought to surface more than I wanted to dwell on in the moment.
There had been a time—before Tobias had burst back into my life—that more than kinship had grown between Kaine and me. We were bonded, of that there was no doubt. But for a brief moment, as we traveled the Expanse at Rudderkin’s orders, I had wondered what my life would have been like if Kaine and I had met under different circumstances. Perhaps somewhere inthe country, where the green hills rolled, and there was no talk of war or bloodshed. Would he have volunteered to carry our children, or would that honor have fallen on me? Would we drive each other mad in our old age, as couples were want to do?
The possibilities swirled around us like a miasma of regret. For we had never been given the chance to consider a life different than ours. For us Urchins, there was only the mission. Only the wants and needs of Rudderkin, and of the rebellion we fought so hard to see victorious. Even when we’d reached the end of that long and winding path, I was content that these feelings would forever remain daydreams of what could have been. Kaine had been my right-hand for so long, he’d become a part of myself. So, of course, there was love there. A love that bound us to one another. But it was not the same kind of love that I felt for Tobias.
“I knew this would happen,” Kaine said eventually, letting out a huff.
“You did?”
“You’re not exactly a difficult read, Azzy. The moment I saw you and Tobias standing next to one another outside Chateau Green, I could see it plain as day on your face. That’s the kind of thing that doesn’t ever go away, I should think.”
“Am I being selfish?” I asked, voicing a question that plagued me night and day.
“So what if you are? It’s your life. At some point, you should be able to live it. Something tells me that if he were awake right now, we would have had this conversation months ago.”
I couldn’t fight the smile that curled my lips. Once again, Kaine saw right through me in a way only he could.
A crackling sound came from Kaine’s belt, and he pulled his hand away from mine to retrieve the communication artifact. He held a finger over one of the runes till it glowed, then spoke into the device.
“Repeat that, over.”
“Is Azrael with you?” Reed’s voice crackled through the artifact.
“Aye,” Kaine replied, his gaze still on me. “We’re in the meeting hall.”
Another response didn’t come through, but after a few moments passed, the doors to the hall burst open and a streak of red blurred into my vision.
“What’s going on?” I asked as Reed came to a stop in front of us, his chest heaving.
“Something’s happened in the Magi City,” he said, breathless.
Kaine was already at Reed’s side. “Get it out, for gods’ sake.”
“It’s the Cradle,” he continued.
Cold sweat bloomed across my forehead. Again, that ache in my chest pulsed. Like an old wound, reminding me of the pain.
“Details, boyo,” Kaine chastised. “What happened?”
“No one knows what it is,” Reed replied. “Eyewitnesses say it’s some sort of mass, expanding from the heart of the Cradle itself.”
“Was it one of the mortals losing control of their magic?” I asked.
“Possibly,” Reed answered. “All we were told was that it was expanding. And…”
