Page 27 of Mine before Dawn
"Hmm?"
For once, she did not retreat.
“It was only a few months after my first bleeding. I was late compared to the other girls in school.”
His hand slid slowly along her back, saying nothing.
“In the morning Amma told me to fetch water from the well.” She placed a soft kiss against the crinkly hair on his chest. “There were visitors on the porch when I came back. Men drinking tea. Women in beautiful saris whispering.”
Her fingers curled against his chest.
“They all looked at me when I walked in. I remember blushing so hard I thought I would die from shame.”
James felt dread settle inside him, though he knew it was in the past..
“There was a young man there, about twenty,” she murmured. “I thought …” She gave a tiny embarrassed laugh. “I mean a few of my friends were married.”
She lifted her head slightly, enough to look at him.
“I did not understand I was being shown to his father.”
James had to stop himself from swearing under his breath.
“I am from aBrahminfamily. In India, it means we are supposed to be a higher caste. And I guess we were once but not anymore. The wedding was very grand for people who had so little money.” Her voice grew distant, wandering backward through time. “They dressed me in a red and gold silk. I had a gold chain that belonged to my grandmother and bangles on mywrists. Flowers in my hair all the way to my waist. My mother told me the groom loved my hair.”
For a moment he could almost see her like that.
A shy child enjoying being the centre of attention for the first time in her life.
“They rubbed turmeric into my skin until I glowed yellow,” she said softly burrowing into him. “Everyone kept saying how beautiful I looked. Aunties pinching my cheeks, my uncles smiling.”
He felt her mood drop though he couldn't see her face. Her words were flat, like she was narrating someone else’s story.
“I loved the attention.”
James closed his eyes briefly.Christ.He didn’t want to hear this.
“I had no idea what marriage meant.” She said it plainly. “No one tells girls these things.”
“You were a child,” he said roughly.
Asha sighed.
“It was common.”
“That doesn’t make it right.”
“No.” She rested her chin on his chest. “But my family was poor. There were too many daughters. We had to be practical.”
Rain hammered harder outside.
James stared up at the ceiling, jaw clenched enough to ache.
“You say it so calmly like it happened to someone else,” he muttered finally.
“Sometimes, I like to pretend that it did.”
He had no answer to that.
