Page 25 of A Castle in the Sky: Fern & Connor
Sawyer stared at the opposite wall. "Graham. Keith. And before that it was Philip. And that's just the ones I know of." He gave a bitter little huff. "She's my sister, and I love her, but I'm not blind."
Connor felt the words land one after the other, heavy and nauseating.
"You're only telling me this now?" Connor rasped.
"I didn't think it was my place. It's her business." Sawyer's jaw tightened. "And I didn't know how serious you were and you were not out official-like. I thought... " He shook his head. "Well, it doesn't matter what I thought. I thought you were into each other, just avoiding it. But telling you we share a father, that's fucked up, even for Matty."
Connor dropped his face into his hands, fingers digging into his scalp.
***
"Sawyer kept talking," he told Fern, voice rough. "He said he shouldn't be telling me this, but that Matilda's been diagnosed bipolar, same as their mum. That their aunt tries to make sure she has her meds, but Matilda doesn't always take them. Says they make her feel flat. Says she feels powerful without them."
He kept cracking his knuckles like he couldn’t keep still. "I didn't know what to do with that. It didn't excuse anything, but it made everything... worse. Is she to blame or the disease? It was like trying to stand upright in a room while the floor kept tilting."
He dragged his hands down his face. "I was still sitting there, trying to understand it all, when Matty walked in."
***
Matilda's laughter floated in, bright and careless. "You are such an idiot, Philip. You should have seen your face when—" She walked into the living room, and stopped dead.
Philip loomed behind her, confusion on his face as he took in the wrecked furniture and the two bruised boys sitting on the floor.
"Uh… " he said intelligently.
Connor pushed himself up slowly, every muscle protesting. He looked at Matilda, at her beautiful, once-beloved face. The girl he'd loved since he was old enough to know what that meant. The girl who'd taken his hand in the woods. The girl who'd watched him lose control and laughed.
Something hard and cold settled in his chest.
"Who is the father, Matilda?" he asked.
She blinked, a little wrinkle appearing between her brows. "What?"
Philip shot her an alarmed look. "I should go," he muttered, edging past her and practically bolting for the door.
Sawyer got to his feet, confusion etched deep. "What father? Connor, what are you talking about? Matty… what's he talking about? Whose father?"
Matilda's mouth opened as if to answer, then her whole face smoothed out, every flicker of emotion ironed away. Her eyes went strangely bright, almost glittering. "You'd like to know, wouldn't you?"
Sawyer stared at her. "Matty—"
She ignored him, tilting her head at Connor. "I loved it," she went on, her voice taking on a sing-song cadence. "You looking all scared when we fucked. So serious, so... earnest. Such a brave little boy scout." Her lips curved, not quite a smile. "I barely kept from laughing."
An expression of pure disgust twisted Connor's features.
"I've spoken to my mum," he said, jaw clenched. "Told her I know about the affair; Mum swore I was my dad's son."
Matilda's gaze sharpened, then her mouth stretched into something that didn't reach her eyes. "Are you sure she is not lying again? That bitch is so good at it," she said calmly. "She is going to suffer, and I'm going to watch."
Sawyer recoiled as if she'd slapped him. "Matilda, what the hell—"
"You need to think about whether you even want to have this baby," Connor forced out. His voice shook, but he didn't look away from her. "This isn't a game, Matilda."
Sawyer stood there, hands spread slightly, expression pure what-the-fuck, as if he'd just realised he'd walked into a play halfway through and everyone else had read the script.
Matilda lifted her chin, as if considering. "Oh, but I am having so much fun. I'm going to have the baby," she said. "I'm going to walk around town, big belly and all, and you're going to look at me and wonder"—she took a step closer, eyes fixed on Connor—"is it mine?"
Sawyer made a strangled noise. "Matilda—"
