Page 29 of Just in Time
The way Blaze stepped in when he got home astounded German. Of course, when he thought about it, German didn’t know why he was shocked. He had agreed to marry Blaze because he was so fucking awesome.
Ahead of Christmas, Blaze had asked German to hold off on putting the star on the tree or shopping for gifts until they could do so together. When German had agreed, he hadn’t realized how important those things were to Blaze. Now German and Ben were in the midst of being dragged from store to store. Loud holiday music filled the air everywhere they went. With Ben’s earphones in place, he looked in every direction with bright eyes. Ben and Blaze wore the same childlike expression. German was a little jealous. Christmas never made him feel the way they looked. Of course, he went to the Steel Security company partyevery year, and that was it. That was as far as his celebrating went. In fact, he spent years begging for the days of trees and presents to end. There was no reason to do anything special alone. The entire season was a neon light reminder he had no one. Blaze and Ben’s life hadn’t been like his. They still believed in magic. For their sake, he pretended to be just as excited.
Blaze held up a tree topper. It was a dinosaur in a Santa hat made to cling to the top of the tree like he rode it. “What do you think? Dinosaur?” He held up a second topper. “Or cat stealing star?”
Ben laughed. “Dinosaur. Rawrr!”
Blaze’s gaze locked on him.
Thankfully, German still smiled at Ben’s reaction and didn’t give away his depressing thoughts. “Definitely dinosaur.”
With a sharp nod, Blaze put the topper in their shopping cart. Two fill-in guards from Steel kept an eye out for crazed fans. Luckily, they shopped in a high-end store in the middle of the day with only a handful of shoppers. No one bothered them.
Blaze passed the cart to German. “Okay. Now you take this and go check out. Use the card I gave you,” he said, sounding firm. “You can get all this in the car while I shop for presents for you guys.”
Ben giggled in his excitement as German buckled him into the seat area of the shopping cart. “We can entertain ourselves.”
Blaze kissed him. “Use the card.”
“I get kisses too.”
Blaze lit like a candle as he turned his attention Ben’s way. “Of course you do. I’d never forget you. Nom. Nom.” Blaze placed ridiculously loud kisses all over Ben’s face before doing the same to German. He shooed them away. “I love you guys. Get lost.”
The way Ben laughed at Blaze’s antics had something lighting inside German. His innocence and the bright decorations had some realization growing. Ben still believed in magic. He was excited about the prospect of presents and sugary treats. They could leave cookies and milk for Santa, take a bite, and give him happy memories. They had a chance to wipe away all the horrible things Ben had witnessed in his short life. German and Blaze could give him normalcy. Well, as normal as someone like Blaze could be.
As he checked out, German stared at nothing. This was temporary. A pain in his chest hit him like a fast-moving car. Ben wasn’t theirs. Yeah, he was family and they would still get to see him, but Dara would get well. She would take custody back—as she should—and German would see Ben two times a year at best. What had he done? Not once since agreeing to this had he truly considered the ramifications. German had been completely focused on taking everything day by day. It hadn’t really been that long, and he couldn’t imagine life without Ben. What would happen if this lasted six months? A year? He already saw how many ways this would break him when Ben left.
Ben patted his arm.
German looked down. Ben had a lollipop. German hadn’t given it to him. A nervous laugh escaped him. Hopefully, Ben had simply snagged that sucker. “Hey, little man. Where did that candy come from?”
Ben pointed toward a jar of free candy for kids. “There. She wants Uncle Justin’s card.”
German shook his head. He flashed the cashier a smile. “Sorry. I really spaced out there for a moment.”
She nodded as he tapped the card reader with his phone, automatically paying from his checking account.
“I used to do that all the time when my kids were little. It’s lack of sleep.”
German kept smiling. He couldn’t bring himself to tell her Ben wasn’t his kid.
She handed him the receipt. “Have a good day. Maybe try to get a nap.”
“Thanks. I’ll try.” German grabbed the cart and headed for the parking lot. Right inside the door, he ditched the buggy and let Ben help him carry their purchases to the SUV. Both guards had stayed with Blaze, as they should have, but it made carrying everything a pain.
Ben made grunting noises as he hoisted his share and marched through the parking lot at German’s side.
German couldn’t stop smiling. As he strapped Ben into his car seat, German made himself a promise. When this was over, German would make the right choice for Ben.
He felt as if he had been sitting behind the wheel forever, waiting for Blaze by the time Blaze finally climbed into the passenger seat. “Okay. I’ve sent the gifts home with the security team, so you guys won’t be peeking and ruining my surprises. It took me so long because I had to stop by and chat with Santa.” He turned in his seat and focused on Ben. “I wanted to make sure he knows how good you’ve been and where to find you this year.”
Ben kicked his feet in his excitement, pushing against the back of German’s seat. “You saw Santa?”
Blaze didn’t hesitate. “Yeah. He’s got a lot of gifts to buy. He’s hitting all the stores.”
“Yay!”
At Ben’s cheer, Blaze’s gaze slid German’s way. Love swelled between them. Blaze was the rightest decision German had ever made in his life. He couldn’t wait to have Blaze alone again. German had some appreciation to show. His patience was low.
