Page 35 of Winds of Ruin
“Stop heckling me,” I said. “I came to say that you have become very important to me and…”
I couldn’t stand to think of a world without him; he was the best part of each day. It was so simple—I should have just told himthat.Yet no more words left me.
His expression softened and I stared at his lips. My insides felt molten; my mouth had dried out. Without the distraction of petty seduction or physical contact, I did not know what to do.
“You’re important to me too,” he responded, without an ounce of jest in his tone. “I know it’s a hard day. I wish I could be with you for it, in the flesh.”
“Not quite in the flesh.”
Dream Ryn’s words echoed back at me, and goose bumps crawled up my arms.
“It isn’t about the day…” I shook my head again. “Well… maybe it is.”
That awful dream had rubbed my heart raw—that was all. A wiser woman would have realized her error before trekking halfway across the realm to pour her affections out to a dear friend.
He wouldn’t feel the same.
Of course he appreciated me—I’d helped him reconnect with his parents. He enjoyed our conversations, but they were theonlyconversations he had otherwise.
I was foolish for even entering the room. How utterly unfair would it be to burden him with such a confession?
Kind golden eyes observed me. “I understand if you need time away from me. Please take care of yourself. I could not brave this curse without you, El.”
The crushing sense of having handled this all wrong pressed down on me. He thought I was pulling away, while every instinct called me closer to him.
I cleared my throat. “I actually just wanted to see you. You’re right. The day got under my skin.”
The temptation to admit more dragged across my tongue.
I’d never learned how to resolve matters of the heart. Matters of the body came so much easier—touch, heat, physical bliss. My attachment to him ran deeper than any of that; it dug aterrifying abyss between us. Stepping into that unknown could yield dreams or nightmares.
“I’ve told you this once before. But someday, I will never let you face this week alone again.”
What about every other week?
I’d fill every waking moment of his if he’d let me. When he woke, he deserved every experience—every choice. A young immortal still, he had so much living left to do…
I plastered a smile on my face, fighting the burn behind my eyes.
“I look forward to that, truly,” I answered. “After all this, what do you want in life, puppy? How do you imagine it?”
Emmerick’s expression turned wistful, but he didn’t break our connected gaze. “It’s hard to imagine,” he admitted.
“Try,” I encouraged. I needed to hear his version of the perfect forever.
He traced his bottom lip in thought, glancing away for only a moment while I obsessed over the motion.
“I imagine a home filled with laughter. No matter how busy the week, I’d cook dinner and my family would gather at the table every night. I’d love them without fear of having it all taken from me. My life would be steady, and quiet, and fulfilling…”
He mentioned no throne, or crown.
A home. A family. A love.
An immortal King who had experienced so little of the world didn’t need a woman like me professing their… importance. So many possibilities lay before him. A younger, more impulsive version of me may have tried to win his attention.
“That sounds lovely,” I breathed out. “When you wake, I’ll help you find it. All of it. Whatever it takes.”
When he met my gaze again, his brow furrowed. Doubt? Disappointment?
