Page 71 of Babies for the Boss
I’m lost in seconds—holding my breath, mind blank, body shaking. After I overheard his conversation with my guards, I knew I couldn’t do anything to stop him. There is no stopping that man on a mission, and more than that, I wanted Fedor dead for what he did to me and mine. I hated the thought of what could go wrong, but I knew it had to be done, either with or without my consent.
So, I stayed put. It was the hardest thing I have ever done.
I paced, cried, had another shower, made the guards fetch me more soup, tried and failed at journaling, watched YouTube videos on three dozen different topics to distract myself, and none of it worked. Nothing stopped me from picturing Pavel with a bullet hole in his forehead like the guy in the car.
So I tried to process that. Held on to the image, while I made myself think about what I’d do next. I had hours to come up with something and came up with nothing.
The only thing I knew was that I was going to fuck my husband if I ever got the chance again. It was puerile and odd, but it was the only thing that made sense to my body and my heart.
I need this man the way I need oxygen. I need him in me, the weight of him on me. There is nothing but that need.
I dig my fingers into his short hair to ride his face, and as the heat builds in my core, I know this won’t do it. It’s not enough.
“I want you inside me, husband.”
He growls into me, then climbs onto the bed, onto me, not slowing, not gentle. As he climbs, he presses his cock into me, and pops his hips the moment we are eye to eye, to shove himself as deep as deep goes.
We groan together, and I pull him down for a kiss, relishing the feel of him. That certain weight, that fullness. The scruff on his chin, the grip of his hands on mine. I let him take me, all of me, and I meet him thrust for thrust in this, because we are in this together, no matter what he says otherwise.
I feel his pulse in his cock. The swell of him. It’s not like him to be close this soon. But it’s been a strange night.
He rolls us so I’m on top, and I take all of him inside of me, leaning onto his chest to hear his heart beat. To count them, catch the rhythm of him. Slowly, we start up again, rocking to each other, faster and faster. Bliss bubbles up inside of me, and when I come, he does too.
Afterward, I’m wrapped in the warmth of him, and I feel—I feel like someone who has fought for something and won it, and is now in possession of it for the first time, which is not peace exactly, but is better than peace because it is real.
“I’m still afraid,” he says, into my hair.
“So am I.”
“That doesn’t resolve anything.”
“No. But we’re doing it anyway. Together. That’s the whole point.”
“You will not go to Chicago.” It is not a question.
“I will visit your friend one day. On a vacation. With you. When this is actually over.”
“And if it is never actually over?”
I shrug. “Then we will figure out what over actually looks like for people like us, and we will keep figuring it out, because that’swhat you do when you have chosen something.” I hold his gaze steadily. “I will always choose you. Every day. Vladimir and Vet did not die for nothing. I won’t let their sacrifices be in vain. Will you?”
“No. But in the interest of no longer keeping secrets, there is one more I should tell you, and you might choose Chicago after you learn the truth.”
“There is nothing you can say to chase me away, Pavel. When will you learn that?”
He gulps. “Vet is alive.”
26
PAVEL
The silencethat follows after she learns Vet lives has a quality. I watch it move through her, turning into bewilderment.
“What?”
“She was shot. That was real—I want to be clear about that, because the rest of it is complicated and I need you to understand that the danger she was in was genuine. She was hit twice, and it was serious, and there was a period in which the outcome was not certain.” I hold her gaze steadily. “But she survived. And when it became clear that she would survive, Igor and I made a decision.”
Molly is very still. “What decision?”
