Page 19 of The PTA President
Making sure my children aren’t listening in on this very adult conversation, I lean in. “Sex was onlyoccasionallyenjoyable. Saturdays were typically the nights we’d make love, once the girls were asleep. Our lives were so busy that I wouldn’t always be in the right mindset to finish.” With raised brows Nat examines her black painted nails and avoids eye contact. “It’s really not a big deal.” I reassure, desperately wanting her to understand. “There’s more to a relationship than sex.”
“You’re right, there is more to a relationship than sex. But you deserve to be with someone who prioritizes your needs in and out of the bedroom. It’s a shame you didn’t enjoy it. You seemlike you’d be a freak in the sheets, Princess.” Her wink heats my chest and works its way up my neck, burning me alive.
With the sex talk behind us, we spend the rest of the day shuffling around the house like we’re one big happy family. I spend a good portion of it in the backyard, enjoying the late summer sun. My red roses have bloomed beautifully even with the recent change in temperature. Having another person here, who isn’t Courtney, has made the mundane things that much more exciting. There’s someone to talk to about the state of my garden and what I should plant next season. Natalie has no interest in this, but that doesn’t stop her from suggesting herbs I should plant so we can have an endless supply of salsa.
She isn’t the biggest fan of nature, so instead she’s relaxing under a shady spot on the porch. She forgot her latest paperback at school so I let her borrow one from my romance collection, and I swear I can hear her eyes roll back. Even though we’re busy with our own hobbies, I’m enjoying the company. Life after divorce is lonely, even with children. They’re older and not by my side anymore. It's just me and my rose bushes most weekends, and it feels isolating sitting here in the dirt listening to nothing but birds chirp. She’s hysterically laughing, occasionally throwing out one-liners she can’t believe made it past editing.
“There’s no way you read this with a straight face.” She clamps a hand over her mouth. “You’re telling me you and those PTA bitches really sit around gossiping about Ronaldo’s aching manhood? I’m impressed.”
“Yes, because at least Ronaldo saves his aching manhood for his one true love rather than spreading his seed around town for anyone to taste,” My voice carries through the backyard, towards my porch.
“Ew, don’t say ‘spreading his seed’ ever again, that’s fucking disgusting.” She slams the book shut.
My attention moves to the loud thud next door, following a fake cough I know all too well. “Excuse me, Candace. Would you ladies mind refraining from your vulgar chit-chat? This is a family neighborhood, please take that kind of language elsewhere,” my neighbor calls over her wooden fence.
“So sorry, Mrs. Henderson.” I’m already on my feet, lunging for Nat as she draws back her arm, book in hand.
“What the fuck did she just say?” she hollers.
“Let's go inside.” Grabbing her wrist, I usher her inside. “I can’t take you anywhere.” I lean up against my glass backdoor, shutting it behind me.
“Dude, explain to me how you can live here? Is this some sort of science experiment? Did you volunteer to have your lives picked apart? Or is it more like a Truman Show situation?” she questions.
Piercing pain shoots through my eye, and out the back of my head, my lungs feel like they’re about to burst. Panic runs through my veins, and I slowly catch my breath, quieting the endless voices shouting at me.
When I finally come to, Nat’s rubbing my back, soothing me. “Candace, relax. Just breathe, everything's okay.”
“It’s not okay.” Tears well, and my lower lip quivers. It’s time for her to go, and the realization hurts worse than what I’m feeling right now. “I just wanna lie down. I think maybe you should leave after all.”
“Seriously? You’re making me leave because of Nosey Nancy next door? Fuck that lady, who cares?”
“It’s not just about my neighbor. It’s the culmination of all the chaos from today. All I wanted was a relaxing weekend, and instead I’m more stressed than I was. I’ve got my parents all over me, and now Mrs. Henderson. Please go home. I'll see you on Monday.” My gaze drifts past her to my front door, before turning back to her. “We all could use a little reset.”
Her lips squeeze tight. “Good idea. That old beetle next door probably alerted the authorities, so I’d better go before they arrest me for having nipple piercings.”
She storms off, clipping her long hair into a messy bun. My heart screams at me, knowing we’re in for another sleepless night. If word gets out, which it probably already has, that there’s a young woman hanging out at my house, swearing and talking about men's private parts, I’m never going to hear the end of it. It’s better this way. What was I thinking, letting her sleep over? The front door slams behind her, leaving my house quiet and me alone again.
“Why’d Nat leave?” The girls’ race to the foyer, opening the door. My heart hurts for them, and I instantly miss her too.
“She had to go home to check on her roommate.” I’m not proud of the lie, but it had to be done. How else do I explain it? “Find something funny to watch. I’ll join you after a quick nap.” I kiss the tops of their heads before leaving them to fend for themselves.
When I lie down, all I smell is her, and all I feel is the emptiness surrounding me. Instead of dreaming, I question everything that transpired and continue berating my conscience for not speaking up before making another huge mistake.
ChaptEr 13
Candace
Fun fact: I’ve never missed anyone like I miss Nat.Her presence was everywhere on Saturday. The boombox never got put away, and the girls spent most of Sunday running through their CDs, discussing which album she’d like and which she’d think was trash. My silk pillowcases smelled like her, even though she usedmybody wash. How is it that she could be here less than forty-eight hours and leave such an impact? Are we so broken that we’d take any kind of attention?
The sharp light shining from my phone screen burns my eyes after staring at it for far too long. Trying to think of something clever to text Nat is harder than I thought. Not only do Inothave a catchy fact or one-liner, I also don't have a good apology for throwing her out over the weekend. Of course, I didn’t sleep more than an hour, plenty of time to run through our interactions and everything I did wrong. An author could makea pretty penny publishing a book filled with all the things I’ve ruined recently.
“Nat said there’s a new Taking Back Sunday album coming soon. Maybe we can go with her to buy it.” The girls go back and forth during our morning drive to school.
She’s infiltrated all of us, although it’s fast, she feels like the missing puzzle piece in our sad, new life. The confusing part is, she’sjusta friend. My sister will stay days on end, and when she leaves the house, it is never in disarray, and neither are we. Thoughts of her in the shower creep in like they’ve done most of the weekend, leaving me no choice but to shake them off and blame my perimenopause hormones.
Betty’s outside waving at all the parents, like it’s her full-time job. “Good morning, Candace. How great to see you all dressed and on time.” I don’t miss her subtle jab at my parenting, as I sweetly smile and wave back at her.
“Nat!” Kate yells, jumping out of the car before I’ve parked. My heart leaps out of my chest when I see the woman my daughters are chasing, and I want to be just like them and run to her.
