Page 75 of Under the Weatherman
She made a face. “Well, that’s a hell of a recommendation.”
“I mean it. I was trying to protect myself, but you turned out to be disarming as hell. You’re funny and smart. I started laughing out of nowhere yesterday remembering your whole thing about the bears. And it’s more than that. You’re kind and gentle and just easy to be around. Despite my initial hesitations, I can’t help wanting to get to know you better, to peel back the layers and find out who you really are.”
“Past the person you thought I was.”
“No, Elizabeth.” I took her hand. “Past the easy surface-level banter and pretty face. I want to knowyou.”
“And I want to know you, so what’s the problem?”
“I’m terrified to show you who I am. I’m worried you won’t want to buy this lemon if you see how deep my darkness goes.” I just wanted to be loved for who I was, but what if I wasn’t enough?
“You’re not a lemon, Evan. Everyone has their demons. I’m not going to force you to open up to me, but if you want us to get past the surface level, you’re going to have to at some point. We can only build trust one brick at a time.” She squeezed my hand. “Tell me about one of these people who burned you.”
Where to start? “A couple of years ago, I met a woman online, and we got along well, so we agreed to meet in person. That was when I sensed something was off.”
“How so?”
“Like she was never free, or when she was, she only wanted to spend time at my place.”
“That’s bizarre. Who wouldn’t want to be seen in public with you?”
I relaxed a little hearing that. The fact she’d wanted to hang out at the library with me proved she wasn’t living a secret double life. “So long story short, when I pushed to meet at her house or even go to the movies, she confessed why she couldn’t: she was already married.”
Elizabeth gasped. “Oh, God. Why would anyone do that? You must have been devastated by that betrayal.”
“I just felt so played. And I’d wasted all that time with her when none of it had been real.” Those weeks following the revelation, I’d felt so alone. So stupid. “I should have probably figured it out. She left me feeling like an idiot.”
“Well, she was the idiot.”
“There’s more.” A lot more, but I didn’t need to go into everything. That was what my therapist was for. “Samantha wasn’t the first person to abuse my trust, and in fact, she wasn’t even the last.”
Elizabeth’s eyes widened. “Oh, shit. I did that to you, too. No wonder you got so upset.”
I pressed my lips together, thinking,Yeah, you did. But she wasn’t alone. “I wasn’t even talking about you. I lost my last job because the boss’s wife accused me of unwanted advances.”
“Jesus. What happened?”
I waved, like I could bat away the question. I didn’t want to cover every single betrayal in my life, but I didn’t want to leave her thinking I’d done something nefarious. “Would you believe me if I told you it wasn’t what it looked like?”
“I dunno. After the weather monitor incident?” She shot me a cheeky grin, and I had to laugh.
“Yeah, well, I admit to being complicit with you. But not with Jeanine Foster.”
“I need more details.” She looked more amused by gossip than horrified at my misfortune.
“Her husband, my boss, discovered us at the company Christmas party with her hand wrapped around my tie and my hands pressing against her shoulders. She was drunk, and I was trying to extricate myself.”
“Yikes.”
I shook my head, still nauseated from that entire debacle. “I was lucky they let me resign.”
“How awful.” She shook her head. “And that’s why you don’t date coworkers.”
“Well, yes but that’s not the only reason. I just don’t want the complication. Dating is already hard enough.”
“No, for sure.”
Did she have bad experiences too? Did other men she dated carry so much emotional baggage? Did she?
