Page 20 of My Dead Wife's Ex Will Do
“That sounds like a quote,” I say.
Logan tosses a smile at me, which I return. “It is. I took my son and him camping once, shortly after they started dating. Lance and I used to do a father-son camping trip every summer, and that was the one and only time we invited Silas.”
“And you haven’t been camping with your son since?” It’s none of my business, really, but I’m morbidly curious about this unconventional relationship.
“Lance and I went on our own the next summer, but then Lance cheated on Silas a few months ago, and well...” He shrugged. “Silas told you at dinner how we ended up together.”
“Oh, so you haven’t been together long?”
Logan shakes his head. “We’ve only been lovers since December, but Silas and Lance dated for two years, so I’ve known him for a while.”
Knowing him as his son’s boyfriend and knowing him as a lover and partner has got to be completely different things, I think.
“The transition’s been a bit strange,” Logan says, as if he read my mind. “I haven’t been hiding him or anything, but I admit we’ve spent the past few months mostly holed up together and not mixing with other people. You know what a new relationship is like.”
I…do not, actually. I haven’t had a new relationship since Leah. I do remember that Leah and I spent the better part of the first couple of months after we started dating in bed, so maybe that’s what Logan means.
“I hadn’t really thought whether we might need an origin story that’s something other than Silas telling people ’I revenge-banged my cheating ex-boyfriend’s dad.’”
I laugh loud enough to startle the perched birds on the fence, and Logan grins at me. “And you and Victor? How long have you been together?”
My laughter turns into a sputtering cough. Logan looks at me with concern, then hands me a water bottle he’d apparently brought along on his hike. I wave it away and compose myself. “Victor and I are not together.”
I sound shocked and Logan lifts his hands in surrender. “Sorry. Adrienne said Kelsey’s dads were going to be at the wedding and I just assumed… Which I shouldn’t have, forgive me.”
“No,” I sigh. “I mean, we are both her dads. Victor is her biological father and I married her mother when she was a little girl. We’ve both been involved in raising her for most of her life. But we’re not...“ I wave my hand in front of me, meaning Victor and me. “I don’t...Victor and I are not…”
I trail off because everything that springs to mind is a lie.
We’re not together. True now, but we were together that one night.
Victor and I are not involved. Depends on what you mean by “involved.”
I don’t feel that way about Victor. Lie. Though I don’t know exactly what I feel about Victor.
When I collect myself and look at Logan, he’s gazing at me with a cool, assessing expression. He seems like the kind of man who can read people, and I look away before he can see too much. “Okay,” he says mildly.
I can’t tell if he’s accepted my explanation of what Victor and I are or has his own opinion. He looks at his watch and slaps his hands on his thighs. “I think sunrise yoga should be finished by now and I’m going to meet Silas for breakfast.”
“I’ll be there shortly.” I say. That little bronze green bird is back and I’d really like add it to my checklist.
“Happy birding,” Logan says with another chuckle and leaves me to it.
Eleven
Victor
I lead a forty-five minute yoga session, shower, eat breakfast, and chat with my daughter, her fiancée, and their friends, all while trying my damndest not to think about Jason’s last words to me last night.
Because if I think about what he said—that he didn’t regret what we did; that he couldn’t promise God he wouldn’t do it again if he had the chance—I will be unable to stop myself from begging him to take another chance with me.
But it’s not like I hadn’t told him he could have another chance with me. And still he didn’t take it.
I take a moment in the men’s room near the restaurant to wash my hands and splash some water on my face. By the time I reach the van that will take us on our expeditions today, everyone’s already loaded and ready. There’s one seat left in the first passenger row.
Next to Jason.
“Morning,” he says gruffly.
