Page 147 of So I'll Know
He doesn’t look high. If anything, his deep brown eyes are clear and focused, and they soften the longer they look at me.
“This is my house,” he repeats. “Well, technically, my closing date is June fifteenth, but it’s basically mine at this point.”
My stomach bottoms out, and I lose the attitude I was so desperately clinging to.
Did he do this to hurt me? To rub it in my face?
He takes a step closer, and I step back as my eyes fill with tears. “I don’t understand.” My lower lip trembles, and I bite it as I try to resist the urge to drop my fingers to my hip.
“Look, Jeremy,” Marcus says. “There’s something I need to say.”
I shake my head. “I don’t want to hear it.”
“Please, Starlight.” His expression is so genuine and earnest.
I want so badly to listen, but how can I give him that power over me again? I already feel like my heart is being shredded.
I sniff. “I suppose you want to go somewhere to talk in private?”
He shakes his head hesitantly. “I hid you from everyone for so long, and you didn’t deserve that. Iwantthem to hear what I have to say, even if it makes me uncomfortable. Especially if it makes me uncomfortable.” He swallows. “So what do you say?”
A tear trickles down my cheek, and I wipe it away quickly, trying to regain some composure. “Okay,” I whisper, conveying with my stare that this is his last fucking chance at redemption. “Tell me something true.”
My request makes him flinch, and I get a little satisfaction from knowing that my words sting.
“The truth is I love you, and I’ve loved you since I was eleven years old.” My breath catches, and Marcus crowds me until our toes touch, and this time I don’t move away. I don’t even breathe. “I met a little boy on the beach, and he became everything to me—an obsession, an expectation, a challenge. You may not have always known it, and it’s toxic as fuck, but you’ve been mine ever since.”
My hands start to tremble as his words fill in the little cracks in my heart, and I squeeze them into fists, trying to control my reaction.
“I never really believed in that soul mate bullshit.” His voice is gravel, and he huffs a choked laugh. “I still don’t know if I do. But I know that when that ambulance took you away, for the first time in my life, you were actually gone, and it wrecked me. I royally fucked up, and I’m so sorry. But I’m doing this now in front of everyone in my life who matters. I—” He clears histhroat, his eyes glistening with unshed tears. “I miss you, Jeremy,” he says, cupping my wet cheeks. “And I’m so helplessly in love with you. And whether you forgive me or not, I just need you to know that.”
My brain short-circuits, and a sob rips up my throat because he did not just declare all this cheesy shit in front of everyone like some sort of nineties romcom.
But he did.
And he did it for me.
I bury my face in my hands and start to cry like a child. He wraps his arms around me, and I melt into his firm chest. He smells like a spicy forest, which just makes me cry harder.
“Shhh,” he whispers. “Baby, it’s okay. You’re okay.”
His words comfort me for a moment before they enrage me, and I rear back, pushing him away. “I’m not okay, Marcus! You made me cry in front of everyone, and I amuglywhen I cry!”
His mouth falls open as he stares at me in shock, obviously unsure about how to react to my outburst. I hear a sniffle behind me and glance back at Charlie and Fiona, who are clinging to each other, almost as wrecked as I am. Even Trey is looking a little red around the eyes.
“You big, stupid lumberjack,” I sputter as I pull my sleeve across my face, probably smearing eyeliner and snot everywhere. “You made them cry too.”
Then, I throw myself into Marcus’s arms, wrapping my legs around his waist. He makes a startledoofsound, which I cut off when I attack his mouth with mine, pouring everything into that kiss.
“I hate you so much,” I sob against his lips as he kisses me back. “I hate you.”
I weave my fingers into his hair and tug it forcefully, making Marcus grunt. My head spins as our lips fight for dominance, dancing together. It feels intimate and wild, just like us. Marcus’s hands grip my thighs tightly, pulling mecloser, and I try to ignore the delicious way our cocks harden in unison.
“Jesus, get a room,” Lincoln grumbles, and I giggle into Marcus’s mouth.
We’re both panting as he lowers me reluctantly to the ground.
“Does this mean you’re gay?” Brantley asks with a shit-eating grin, and Seb kicks him.
