Page 12 of Clueless
Her answer is a quiet whisper. “Yes.”
My eyes close.
Goddamn it.
No wonder she turned white with anxiety. Not only was she panicking about seeing a one-night stand—that happened to be my stepdad—but she probably thought she walked into a threesome with zero consent.
I don’t even have the courage to look back at her when I respond. “Do you think it’s gross?”
Lauren chokes on a laugh. “I literally just told you that I fucked him through a glory hole, and you’re asking me if I find yougross? Don’t you think you should be repulsed bymeinstead? I’m waiting to get dumped right now.”
Jesus Christ.
I don’t know whether to be extremely turned on right now or even more nervous. But this is something I need to know. “Answer the question, please.”
I jump when her arms snake around my waist. I didn’t even know she got up. She presses her nose into the middle of my back, nuzzling into my warmth. Regardless of the plethora of thoughts swarmingthrough my brain, it makes me relax, and I grip one of her hands as she responds. “No, Noah. I don’t think it’s gross. Everyone is consenting adults, and people like what they like. It’s not like the man raised you.”
I nod my head.
I needed to hear that.
She hesitates before asking, “Have you two been together while we’ve been seeing each other, though?”
I’m instantly shaking my head. I turn around to face her, cupping her heart-shaped face in my hands. My words are raw. “Absolutely not. It’s just been us. And frankly, I think I’m starting to fall in love with you. But I won’t lie that…it’s been a want, sure. But no, no cheating.”
Her lower lip wobbles. “You love me?”
“I do. You make me happy.”
“But…?”
“But…this is what I like. This is what makes me happy. This is what makesushappy. One woman, just for us. Sexually, romantically. Exclusive. That’s why I’ve been so on edge today. I knew this would come out, somehow. I just didn’t think it would happen likethis, with there already being history.”
She makes a little scoffing sound as if to sayno shit,and it makes me smile. “Yeah, I kinda pieced that part together.”
Now it’s my turn to make that odd sound. “So…?”
She instantly knows what I’m questioning. “I’ve never done the whole sharing thing, outside of just sex. I don’t really know how it works.”
I feel guilty for the hope that blooms through me.
She’s not running for the hills, at least.
Lauren continues. “But I’m willing to try. As long as he doesn’t despise my existence.”
I shake my head. “Believe me. He’s told me for literally a year now how he didn’t know if he could share again…because he may have found the one.”
Her eyebrows rise in shock. “Theone?”
Deciding to pull a fuck-it moment, I lean down and pick her up, carrying her to the bed. She lets out the cutest sound of surprise, and when we land on my bed, I make her straddle my lap. “Mhhm. I was jealous every single time he brought it up. How could I not be? We would fool around sometimes. And I kept wanting to know what was so special about this girl. I wanted to experience that.”
My eyes roll when Lauren settles her weight down on me entirely, and as luck would fucking have it, grinds against the boner I’ve been fighting. A grunt leaves me as she says, “Well, now that you know who she is, what do you think?”
“I think I understand why he’s been so ruined.”
Her eyes line with tears.
I don’t know everything about her past yet, but Iknow more than enough to conclude that she’s never felt genuinely loved.
