Page 67 of Torment Me Knot
I do know that. The memory is toxic enough to come real and poison me.
“Please, Espie. You don’t want to end up…” His breath halts and I know he meant ‘like him’.
“It’s selfish of me, but I need you. I can’t let you disappear.” He strokes my hair and whispers in my ear. “And don’t let that cunt win.”
His curse is so unexpected a huff bursts out of me. He leans back. “And it will feel good to get it out.”
“What if I start and I can't stop.”
“Then you don't stop. I've got you for the whole thing.”
“We’ve got you too, sweetheart,” Sera says. Her gaze burns and I know she has. They all have. They’ve proven that over and over again.
I close my eyes against his throat, breathing in his scent.Gods this is so hard.
“Please, Espie. Let us help you,” Lex whispers.
He's right.
They’re all right and they need to know. I can't keep this thing locked up in me knowing there's a door they don’t have a key to.
Aubrey palms the back of my head and gently brings my nose against his neck. I suck in his scent, letting it calm me. Ground me, before I tear off a chunk of myself and hand it over to them.
Aubrey strokes my hair and whispers in my ear, and slowly, slowly my heart stops thumping and my chest loosens. I draw in his scent and it’s tinged with the alphas’ scents. They all mix and I inhale them all in.
Thump. Tha-thump. Tha-thump. Wallace can’t get me. Not here, and maybe…if I tell them… they can stop him. Stop him from harming anyone else.
I start with the facts that might just do that. “Wallace didn't keep me in one place. There were facilities. Plural. Different buildings. Different equipment. Sometimes the voices behind the glass were different too.”
I suck in another breath, letting their scents filter into my bloodstream. Focus on Aubrey’s gentle strokes through my hair.
“They blindfolded me when they moved me. Tied my hands behind my back. I couldn’t see but…I’m sure they moved me in a train. I heard the sound of tracks, I think.”
“How long were you with each location?” Sera asks.
“I don’t know. Long enough for the sedation to last. All but a couple of times, but as soon as they knew I was coming awake, they sedated me again.”
“That could mean they moved you anywhere from suburb to suburb to across counties,” Kev says.
“It fits,” Sera says, voice tight.
Aubrey laces his fingers through mine under the blanket. He squeezes. Doesn't let go.
“There were other omegas.” My mouth has gone dry. “I never saw them. I just heard them. In the vehicles. Crying. Begging. Screaming when they first came up out of the drugs and worked out what was happening. Some of them were young. A lot of them were young. There was one girl whose voice broke right in the middle of a sob and then she just went quiet. I don't know if she stopped because she'd given up or because they...”
“Gods.” Kev. Choked. “Oh, Gods, Espie.”
Aubrey presses his forehead to my temple. Breathes against me.I'm here. Keep going.
“Is there anything else you can tell us, Espie? Did they mention any names of suburbs. Anything that could pinpoint a location?” Sera kneels in front of me, hands hovering as though she doesn’t know where to touch me.
She’s hurting so bad. Hurting because of me, and none of this is her fault. I bring my hand from beneath the blankets and reach for her. Her fingers lace through mine and my muscles go lax and when they do, unfinished fragments flow through my head. I try to latch onto them but they’re gone when I try.
I shake my head. “Nothing I can grasp but…” My throat closes over. “Wallace he…”
“What did he do, sweetheart?” Sera asks.
I fall into her amber gaze. Aubrey is holding me. Sera has my hand. My alphas are here, holding space for me. “Wallace he…” I force the words out, because if he experimented on me, he’d do the same to the others too. Other omegas who are still there. “He forced me into heats. He had them numbered. I’d passed forty-three before you found me.”
