Page 10 of Grip Me Tight
I’ve got nothing against sex work, but this wasn’t something we’d ever talked about or even shown any interest in. At least on my side. Turns out Jake thinks I’m a bit boring and too sheltered and I would benefit from him broadening my sexual horizons.
A shiver snakes down my back at the memory of his ugly anger, the way he pushed the escort away when she stood in front of me, trying to hold him back as he grabbed me to tell me he wasn’t going to let me say no before he got his money’s worth. The way his eyes lit with excitement when he saw my fear and how he pressed forward, trying to get my dress up, one hand thrusting roughly between my legs as I cried out because he was hurting me.
I’d gotten lucky that night when the woman told him to leave before she called the police.
He’d left, screaming to me that if I let him go, he’d find someone else.
I let him go.
“What happened with Jerk?” Noah asks, rubbing a towel over his hair. My brother never liked Jake and constantly referred to him as Jerk. I always rolled my eyes and assumed he was being over-protective as usual, but as much as I hate to admit my brother is right about anything, he was definitely right about that one.
Jake pushed me for months, telling me I needed to try new things, but those things often made me uncomfortable. One morning, I’d woken up at Claire’s with the worst headache and no memory of the night before. Claire said Jake told her I had too much to drink, but with my medication, I really only stick with Sprite and I couldn’t remember if I’d ordered anything different. He wanted to let me sleep it off at the party, but she didn’t like that idea at all and piled me into an Uber. Jake argued with me the next day, trying to convince me I had eaten something to make me sick or maybe it was my medication. I actually felt bad about leaving him at the party, even though I don’t remember how I left.
After our break-up I couldn’t help but wonder if he’d given me something.
I shrug. “You know, graduation and stuff.”
“You don’t seem very broken up about it.” Tanner’s voice is flat.
“Well, I’m definitely not sad he’s history. That guy was a total douche. I couldn’t figure out what you saw in him at all.” Noah tosses the towel over the back of a lounger. “But I’m surprised you didn’t mention it.”
“I don’t tell you everything, you know.”
“No, but I thought Gordon would have said something.”
Everyone groans. Gordon is Noah’s baby, his pride and joy. And he’s a bearded dragon. A very cute, bearded dragon and I manage his social media account, which is more work than it sounds, but I love it. Gordon has these amazing little outfits, and he goes on adventures which I detail in the posting. He was almost instafamous before the world found out he was Noah Whitlock’s dragon, but when Noah took a selfie with Gordon and tagged him, Gordon went viral. Now I manage both his social media and his ad portfolio. In fact, a greeting card company recently hired Gordon as one of their models and I was presently negotiating Gordon’s rate for the use of his image on gift items like socks and mugs.
I roll my eyes at my brother. “Maybe Gordon just found out.”
I didn’t even tell mom and dad until the other night because I really don’t want the third degree about how I’m feeling, even if they mean well. On top of that, Jake keeps sending me random apology texts. We are definitely done, but I did have a moment of weakness where I thought maybe he really was sorry and I was going to invite him here to talk, but his texts got aggressive, so I told him to leave me alone. He’s still texting me. I need to do what Claire suggesting and block him.
“Well, you don’t need that guy anyway,” Noah says, stretching out on the lounger.
I can’t resist poking him a little. “True. It’s not like many guys can measure up to Ajax Petrakis anyway.” I throw a little smile at Ajax, who looks like a deer caught in the headlights.
“Ugh. This ugly bastard? I better not see those crazy eyes on my baby sister.”
My shoulders tighten and embarrassment floods my stomach. First Tanner, then Noah. Even mom and dad have been hovering since they found out I broke up with Jake. When will my family ever see me as more than a little girl? I prop a hand on my hip and balance an imaginary tray. “Who ordered the misogyny? Anyone? Looks like a tall, cold glass of sexism right here.” I pat Ajax on the head. “Don’t look so scared, big guy. I bet you could take my brother in a fight.”
“Yeah, but he couldn’t take both of us.” Tanner takes off his sunglasses and levels me with a stare.
I turn on him. “Oh, you must have ordered the double-standard, then? Are you guys checking for identification in the VIP to make sure all the girls are older than me? Twenty-four is your cut-off?”
Ajax chuckles. “Don’t give him any ideas, Sterling. He’ll probably start doing exactly that. Tanner and Laird are total mama bears when it comes to the rest of us.”
“Well, someone has to be, the way you guys go looking for trouble.” Tanner responds drily.
I pull the scrunchie from my hair and let my hair fall to my shoulders, shaking it out before twisting it back up into a tighter bun. “Lucky for me, I’m not with the band, so you don’t have to worry about it.”
“Princess, I don’t think you have to look for trouble. I’m pretty sure it just finds you.” He hands me his sunglasses and I take them without thinking as my mouth drops open. Who died and made him king? I’m searching for a suitable response when Tanner reaches for the back of his shirt and pulls it over his head, my breath catching at the sight of his chiseled chest and the ridges of his stomach. The man is gorgeous. Obnoxious, but gorgeous.
His hair is ruffled, and I detect the slightest hint of color on those sharp cheekbones when he meets my eyes, his gaze full of challenge. I swallow hard. I’m nearly twenty-four but being around Tanner still makes me feel like a teenage fan-girl, hot, flustered and torn somewhere between extreme excitement and tears. I shrug off the uncomfortable urge to exaggeratingly widen my eyes and waggle my head in true baby-sister fashion and instead stare back at him until he blinks, turning away to dive into the pool, eliciting more giggles from Claire, who’s standing near the deep end and gets splashed by the spray.
That’s how I’ve always felt with Tanner. Like I’m standing by the deep-end, too nervous to jump, my heart jumping with anticipation.
I watch as he swims the length of the pool without stopping, taking strong, measured strokes through the water. It’s funny how familiar he is to me. Noah thinks of him as a brother. My parents love him like a son. But, despite loving him as a friend long before I started crushing on him, I’ve never had any brotherly feelings toward him and he’s definitely aware of my crush. Maybe I’m the problem. That it’s me who makes things weird and that’s why he’s stayed away so long. I mean, mom and dad get to see him, of course. They sometimes fly wherever the band is or drive to New York if he’s there. My parents even went to California for a couple of weeks while the band was filming parts of their Allflix special. So, it’s not like if he chooses to see the family, he has to see me. He just works around it.
I thought things would be different now that we’re adults. I’m not a teenager with a crush and he’s one of the biggest rock stars in the world so it shouldn’t be weird. I shouldn’t remember the feel of his lips on mine, or the way my body fit into his arms.
