Page 45 of Cross the Line
And I couldn't shake the feeling that whatever happened to him, I was responsible.
"Carlson."
I barely registered Hawley as we reached our desks. Daniel's face kept flashing in my head. Not the battered version I was about to see, but the younger one. Nervous kid sitting across from me in that 52 Division interrogation room, deciding whether to trust me.
I'd promised him safety.
Look how that turned out.
"Carlson." Firmer this time.
I blinked. Focused on Hawley. He stood by our desk, palm extended.
"Keys," he said.
I stared at his open hand for a moment before understanding clicked. He was offering to drive. A small gesture acknowledging my state of mind without making a production of it.
I dropped the keys into his palm without argument. "Thanks."
Reid appeared with a canned coffee, bright-eyed and hopeful. "Detective Carlson! I got your..."
"Sorry, Reid." I grabbed my jacket. "Hospital call. We have to go."
His face fell. "Of course. Should I hold this for when you return?"
"You can have it. Might be a while."
Hawley was already moving toward the exit. Efficient and purposeful. I followed, grateful he wasn't the type to ask questions I couldn't answer yet.
Once in the car, I leaned back against the headrest and closed my eyes. The engine rumbled to life. Hawley pulled into traffic without a word.
The silence between us wasn't uncomfortable. But it feltcharged. Heavy with unasked questions.
"You don't have to tell me," Hawley said. Eyes on the road. "But if it affects the case, I need to know."
I opened my eyes. Watched Toronto blur past the window.
"Daniel trusted me." The words came easier than I expected. "He was a small-time dealer when I first met him. Smart kid from a poor background who got caught up with the wrong people. I convinced him to be my CI. Promised I'd protect him."
The unspoken weight of those words hung between us.I failed to keep that promise.
"The leak came from inside the department. Someone with access to the CI files. We never found out who." My throat tightened. "But whoever it was, they burned three informants. Including Daniel."
Hawley's knuckles whitened on the steering wheel. The only indication he was listening intently.
"After everything fell apart, Daniel disappeared. I tried to find him, but..." The memory of frantic calls, dead-end leads, growing dread. "Eventually I had to stop searching. The transfer to 51 wasn't exactly optional."
A single nod. "And now he's found you."
"Or someone found him and made sure I'd know about it."
The hospital loomed ahead. St. Michael's, white and sterile against the blue spring sky. As we pulled into the parking lot, I steeled myself for what was coming.
Confronting the consequences of a past I'd tried to leave behind.
And the man who'd paid the price for my failure.
Chapter 18: The Spare Key
