Page 176 of Someone Like Me
The man I love takes this on the chin, the clenching of his jaw the only sign of how bad it hurts. I want to wrap my arms around him, but I don’t dare move. This isn’t my crisis. All I can do is invite healing.
I mentally fan through my library of gods and goddesses, in search of one to appeal to for Drew, but then I remember where I am, the ground on which I stand. Mrs. Vivian’s house. And the answer is clear.
Raphael the Archangel.
For Catholics, even though he’s an angel, he’s the patron saint of healing. I close my eyes for a moment and send up a silent prayer asking him to help Drew’s mother find forgiveness so this relationship may be healed. As I breathe through my plea, peace steals over me, and I open my eyes with the distinct feeling that Mrs. Vivian would approve.
Drew is looking at his mother, his eyes soft and unguarded. “For a long time, I didn’t want you to,” Drew says. Lottie blinks, and I can see this admission surprises her. “But now, I want forgiveness. Yours… Anthony’s… My own. Whatever I don’t have now, I’ll work to earn it.”
She narrows her eyes, looking skeptical but curious. “How will you aim to do that?”
Drew doesn’t hesitate. “By living the kind of life Anthony would have.” At the mention of her lost son’s name, Lottie winces in pain, but Drew keeps talking. “Working hard… living right…” He reaches back for my hand, takes it and pulls me against him. “Raising a family and taking care of it.”
Lottie glances to me and then back at Drew, and I can’t be sure, but I think I see something new in her eyes. Something like possibility. But she doesn’t speak.
Somehow, Drew knows exactly how to read her silence.
“I’m learning that if I forgive myself, it doesn’t mean I forget him,” he says, and I know immediately this is exactly what needs to be said. What he needs to say and what she needs to hear because when the words are spoken, Lottie’s eyes well with tears. “And maybe it’ll even help me to remember him.”
She holds his gaze for a moment, her mouth bunched tight as she fights to keep her face from collapsing, and then she looks down, gives a quick nod, and then turns on her heel. We hear the front door open and close.
Drew doesn’t move. Doesn’t speak. So I don’t either.
But I do press into him, wanting only for him to feel me. To know I’m here and I always will be.
At last, his arm around my waist holds me tighter. “That was… unexpected.” I can’t tell if he sounds encouraged or disappointed.
“She wants a relationship with you. That’s something.”
His hand pats me on the hip. “I don’t know about that,” Drew says flatly. “But maybe shewantsto want to have a relationship with me. Thatissomething, and I’ll take it.”
I settle my right hand on his chest. His heart beats beneath it, steady and sure. “Well, if she never gets around to actually wanting one, it’ll be her loss.” I speak lightly, but my words are still defensive, and I can’t help my frown.
When the laughter purrs from deep in his chest, I feel it. “Glad you see it that way, Guppy.”
I let the hand at his chest travel up to his collarbone, along his neck, and rest at his cheek. He looks down into my eyes, and I run my thumb over the terrain of his smile.
“I love you,” I whisper.
His mouth opens, and the tip of my thumb disappears between his teeth. Lips and tongue claim my flesh with a hard suck that pulls a gasp from my throat.
“I love you, too, Evie,” he mumbles around the digit.
And this is how his Aunt Josie finds us, wrapped in each others arms and my thumb in his mouth.
“I was — Oh!” I jump away as she stops just inside the foyer, eyes wide and immediately amused. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt—“
“S’okay, Aunt Josie,” Drew says, pulling me back against him despite my effort to keep just a little space between us. But I give in when my front meets his. No point in pretending right?
And I suppose this is our home now, so…
“I just wanted to tell you that we’re starting the clean-up. Nelson and Shelly are getting ready to leave. Is it okay if they take the rest of the ham?”
“They can have whatever they want,” Drew says, before meeting my eyes. Then he smirks. “Except maybe that zuchinni casserole.”
Josie grins. “I’ll leave that here and one of the pecan pies. I know you like those. I, uh…” She checks me over, seeming to hesitate over her next words. I return her smile. “I took the liberty of making up the big bedroom upstairs. I figured if y’all wanted to stay in the house tonight, it might be too soon to use Mama’s room.”
Drew’s spine stiffens. “You figured right.”
