Page 2 of Cessation
“Thank you, baby. Now that Trust got his speech out the way, can we eat? I have been famished since I got off work.”
Trust had been my man for over a decade and the way our relationship was set up had me confused at times. I didn’t know what we were doing half the time, but I knew I loved him deeply. He was the person I made a family with, and I had no intentions on breaking that up. He was my comfortability.
Over the ten years of us being together, I endured more than any woman should, but I stood by him due to the son we shared and the bond we built over the years. I also had a heart full of great memories. I had so much love for Trust that it hurt me to even think about us ending.
Just as I got comfortable, the waitress showed up ready to take our orders. After riddling off what we wanted, the night began to progress. I couldn’t get over how much I matured with everyone seated except the plus ones. They were just now learning me, but my girls and my man had been by my side since high school.
“So, I know how you like to eat and then go home and be withyour man, but there’s a new strip club in town and I heard many things about it. I say we stop by and turn it out for the one time,” Calina voiced.
“Oh, you talking ’bout Sensation. I heard the strippers in there be throwing it and actually knows how to dance. I’m down to go,” Winnie chimed in.
I looked at Trust and he gave me that look saying it was up to me. I always had a good time when I was out with my girls, so I figured why the hell not.
“Shoot let’s do it then. We’ll have to stop by the ATM so I can grab a few bills for them to be exchanged but I can go for a lap dance or two,” I responded.
“I knew you would say yes. I had gone ahead and got us a booth there so we wouldn’t be sitting around at no darn table begging for a table dance like the rest of them broke folk.”
“Now Calina you didn’t have to say that. People out here doing the best they can,” I said trying not to laugh. Lina was the friend that called it how she saw it. It didn’t matter who you were, you could become the main character and quick.
“Girl please. It’s two types of people that visit the strip club. Those that don’t have it to give but give it anyway and those that got it and just want to have a good time. The latter gets booths, while the other’s get tables for ten-dollar dances. There’s a difference.”
“Lina shut up. You just got a new position at work and now all of a sudden, you’re a millionaire. Please calm down,” Dawn decided to jump in as well.
“Don’t y’all start. We’re going so no need to get catty. The food is here so let’s just eat and vibe out. It’s my day and I say no arguing, okay?”
I had to put my foot down and put a halt to the conversation at hand because Dawn and Lina would go back and forth for hours at a time. I wasn’t about to allow them to mess up my night. They were stating their opinions and they just needed to leave it at that.
For some reason, I couldn’t enjoy my food the way I wanted. It was mostly due to Trust checking his phone every few minutes. I was confused on who could be blowing him up like that. His phone hadn’t rung all evening but now that we were out, it was going nonstop and no matter how much I tried to ignore it, I just couldn’t shake that some bullshit was about to occur.
I leaned over into his personal space so that what I asked wouldn’t be heard by the table. “Who is calling you like that?”
When he looked at me with those sad eyes, I knew exactly who was interrupting my dinner. I couldn’t help but kiss my teeth. Dawn noticed and gave me a concerning look. I threw my fork down to my plate and proceeded to head to the bathroom. However, Trust wasn’t going to let me be. He was on my heels ready to plead his case.
“Baby wait.”
Yanking my arm from his grasp, I turned around and questioned, “Why Trust? All you’re about to do is tell me some bullshit story on why you have to go.”
“It’s not bullshit baby. Xara —”
“Let me guess, she gave you some made up story about Truce, huh?” His silence spoke volumes. “Tuh. I should’ve known. Every time you let her know our plans, she finds a way to make it about the baby. You know what Trust, just go. I’m so tired of this.”
“Come on Yani. Don’t do that. You know it was her birthday today and she probably got a stomachache or something.”
“Yeah, well at least one of our birthday’s matters. Get out my face before I say or even do something I’ll regret. A fuckin’ stomachache? Nigga her mama is a nurse!”
Shaking my head, I left him where he stood and entered the women’s bathroom. Ever since I accepted his illegitimate child, things between us had been estranged. The most intimacy we had was when we were drunk. Other than that, we pretty much existed as if we had a routine to follow.
So many times, I tried to relight that fire between us, but I seemed to fail tremendously. I loved Trust and at times I loved him more than I did myself. He was the man that held my heart for over ten years, and I had no thoughts of snatching it back. Nowadays, I felt like his interest lied elsewhere.
“No ma’am. You are in makeup and it’s your birthday. Whatever happened, is not about to ruin that.” I knew Dawn wasn’t going to let me be in here alone too much longer. She burst through the door and got one good look at me before running off at the mouth.
“I just wanted a night with him Dawn. He goes running to her as if me and Brendon means nothing to him. Don’t you know he skipped out on Brendon’s recital all because that bitch called and said Truce wanted him. Dawn I am so sick and tired of coming second when I have held the number one spot in that man’s life for God knows how long.”
I was furious but also hurt and the pain took precedence over the anger. No one knew how much I sacrificed just to make sure our family stayed intact. It was my fault for how he acted though. I gave him no consequence for going out and cheating on me with Xara. She had his daughter which I failed to give him since Brendon. He was more interested in making Xara happy than the family he already had.
“Tonight, we drink, and have a good time. I know how much you want Trust to be here, but it’s clear that he doesn’t care. Please stop letting that man determine whether you’re going to have a good day or not.”
“You say that like I give him power over me.” I stood and began to clean my face up.
