Page 16 of What If It Was Us
I crawled into bed when I got home, snuggling under the covers and placing my hand over the spot on my thigh where Jackson had touched me. I rubbed my thumb back and forth, pretending it was his.
Chapter 8
BEFORE
December, Fourteen Years Ago
Ididn’t see the Delvecchios until the following Friday when Julie and Jackson picked me up for my shift. Jackson sat between us in the truck, and he smiled at me when I squeezed in beside him. I tried not to blush when our eyes met.
He was tapping his fingers on his thighs to the beat of the music, but his pinky kept grazing across the top of my thigh.
When we got to the restaurant, Julie tapped the corkboard with the Polaroids. “You officially made the board,” she said with a wink. I dragged my eyes over the Polaroids, finding a picture of me between Jackson and Julie at the Christmas party, their arms wrapped around me. There was another photo right beneath it of me sitting at the bowling alley, tying the laces of one of my Converse, and laughing with my eyes closed. Jackson was standing next to me in the photo, his arms crossed, smiling down at me. I wanted to take the photo off the wall, stuff it in my pocket, and hide it under my pillow at home. I wantedto keep that photo forever, to remind myself every night of the way he was looking at me; that it was real and someone had captured it.
We were slammed tonight, and our shift was flying by. It was the Friday before New Year’s Eve, and apparently everyone and their mom was craving Italian. Jackson and I were rushing around all night, clearing tables and running out food for the wait staff. Every time we cleaned the same table, his hand somehow found mine. It wasn’t much contact, but it felt intentional every time our fingers grazed, or whenever he placed a hand on my arm or back as we passed each other in the kitchen.
I started doing it back to him, purposely brushing my arm against his if I had to walk by, reaching into the same bucket for a wet rag, and acting like I didn’t realize we were about to grab the same set of silverware. I was addicted to the way his skin felt against mine. All I wanted to do was touch him.
At the end of the night after all the other employees left, Julie poured us each a small glass of wine. “That was a day,” she said as she drained the entire thing in one big gulp. Jackson passed his phone around so we could each pick songs to close to.
“You two pick the music, I’m going to run home really quick to shower and change. I have a party to get to tonight. I’ll come pick you guys up and take you home.”
Julie had never left the two of us to close by ourselves, but I didn’t mind. We had our routine down to a T; it wouldn’t take too much longer without her, especially if we weren’t fooling around and singing.
When Julie left, I started taking off the tablecloths while Jackson started vacuuming. “Lollipop” by Lil Wayne was playing at an obnoxious volume over the speakers, and Jackson sang to himself as I shoved the last of the tablecloths in the laundry hamper.
“Crazy In Love” by Beyoncé started next, and on my way back out to the dining room, I accidentally kicked the foot of a shelf that held empty food containers, causing three to tumble to the floor. I reached up to replace the last of the containers I’d knocked down, but I couldn’t get it to balance. I stood up on my tiptoes, jumping up to try to get it to stay.
“I’ll get it.”
I could hear Jackson’s shoes scuffling across the kitchen tile until he was right behind me. He reached up to place his hand over mine, his chest pressed against my back as he pushed the container into place.
The feeling of his breath on my neck and the hardness of his chest pressing into my shoulder caused me to arch my back and press into him. He sucked in a large gasp of air, and his hands gripped the shelf on either side of me. I spun around but neither of us made any attempt to move away from the other. We were close enough for me to feel the hardness that was growing under his belt.
Memories of us kissing in the closet flashed through my mind like a runaway train, and I gripped the shelf behind me, the sides of my hands resting up against his thumbs where he still held the shelf, blocking me in place. His hands moved down to hold my hips against him just like he did in the closet, and every rational thought left my mind. I hiked up one of my legs to rest on the counter behind Jackson, and his erection pressed against the perfect spot between my legs. We both gasped at the pressure.
He pressed himself more firmly against me, and I let out a small whimper. We were grinding against each other, the hormones and the want that had been building up since the party overtaking any other thought in my brain. Part of me wanted to kiss him again, but I was addicted to the sound of his small gasps; I wasn’t ready to silence them just yet. I could get drunk off those sounds he made.
I could feel the pressure building, and I was almost sent over the edge by the way he gruffly choked out, “Addison.” I loved the way he said my full name, like he couldn’t believe this was happening. Our eyes locked again, and he finally leaned forward to kiss me. I closed my eyes to meet him when the sound of the back door opening caused us to fling apart like opposite magnets.
Jackson started messing with his pants and turned his back to Julie as she stepped into the kitchen.
Her eyes shot back and forth between the two of us, and I tried to slow my breathing as the last bridge of “Crazy In Love” blasted through the speakers. My heart was surely jumping out of my chest.
“I, uh . . . forgot my phone,” she said as she continued to look at both of us.
“I gotta go to the bathroom,” Jackson mumbled before leaving the kitchen.
I didn’t say a word, and I watched as Julie walked to the counter that my foot had just been propped on. I could see the footprint from my Converse on the edge.Oh God.She looked out the kitchen doors before turning to face me again.
“Listen Addie, I don’t know what I just walked in on. But nothing can happen between you and Jackson, okay?”
I could feel my cheeks burning up, and I stared at my shoes as I nodded my head.
“Promise me, okay? My mom would flip. She caught me kissing one of the bartenders one time, and it wasn’t pretty.” She placed a hand on my shoulder, forcing me to meet her eyes. “Our family really likes you, and I know you need this job. Don’t fuck it up by screwing around with Jackson.”
“O-okay. I promise, Julie.” I was mortified, and I knew my neck was covered in a flush.
She nodded at me again just as Jackson came back into the kitchen. Her eyes narrowed at him, and I felt my skin prickle with discomfort. “Don’t touch her again,” Julie demanded. Then she walked out the back door.
