Page 70 of CHOICE Lover
Res6 leans back in his chair, trying to adopt a casual façade. Leave it up to equally curious Electra to conjure the possibility. One day, when he succeeds, he’ll have to tell her. She’ll be livid, of course, and probably want nothing to do with him, which he’ll count on Jerme to smooth over. Or he can tell her now and suffer her disgust. But he might fail and lose her. Is it worth it to upset her when things are going so well? Especially in light of his burgeoningfeelings. Better for him to wait to confess until after he succeeds. Zorg, he can’t wait till Jerme is back.
He clears his throat. “No, I’ve never considered that.”
She nods. “That’s probably a good thing. I can’t imagine the ethical considerations. For example, if someone didn’t wish to be brought back, doing so might take away their agency . . . or cause them more emotional pain.”
That can’t be true. There are thousands of stories of people surviving a suicide attempt and regretting the attempt afterward. Despite that, the weight of her words hangs in the air between them. By her sympathetic expression, he knows they’re thinking about the same person. Not vivacious and full of life Electra, of course.Jerme. He’s always assumed his twin’s decision was a mistake. That Jerme got caught up in the emotions of an especially bad day. He thought if he could just show him how loved he was, he’d see the reason for living. But what right does he have to undo Jerme’s choice? Would Jerme wish to stay dead?
The question makes bile rise in his throat.
Her gaze is dissecting, like she’s prodding around his insides with a laser scalpel. She must decide he’s not the monster he actually is because she reaches across the table, brushing his arm. “Res6, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to—”
“It’s fine,” he says decidedly. Because in the footage he’s watched a dozen times, Jerme never staggered back toward the door. Never even looked at it. He just sat down on the sidewalk, leaned against the wall, and closed his eyes. The undeniable truth, which he’s avoided until this second, is right before him, forcing him to speak. Though it makes his chest feel like it’s being ripped in two for a second time, he says, “Jerme probably wouldn’t want to be brought back.”
23 – Web of Lies
Res6
Why did he lie? It’s not like he owes her the truth, does he? So what if he’s selfishly trying to bring back his dead brother? Sure, Jerme might be upset at first, but he has Electra to help him solve Jerme’s issues.
He reaches around the fully formed Jerme experiment and sets the scanner down on a shelf. The scan looks perfect. In a few hours the light will turn green, and he’ll be ready to activate it. His anticipation is making him jittery.
Chryl lounges on the bed, watching something on her tablet, giggling occasionally, unlike the body-double manupartner, who seems content to stare blankly at the wall or watch him like it’s doing now.
“Something bothering you?” it asks. “Thewomanagain?”
Even though he’s now had a dozen conversations with the unit about Electra and her nature, it still calls herthe woman. Telling the manupartner was probably a highly inadvisable plan, but he’s exasperatedLextr and Tommy talking about her and, well, DumBot is dumb. His body double’s selected traits make it such a good sounding board, and it looks just like Jerme. One day, he just blurted it all out. He should invent a line of therapy manupartners—he’s getting distracted.Focus, Res6.
“She doesn’t approve of my experiment.” And in a few hours, she’s going to find out and they’re going to have a blowup—between Electra and a newly resurrected Jerme, it will be a challenging few days, but it will be worth it.
He glances toward the now closed closet, then at Chryl, who looks up from the tablet. He points to the noise-canceling headset on the nightstand. Chryl frowns, but puts it on. In a too-loud, pouty voice she says, “I don’t know why I don’t get to be part of your little talks.”
Thank you, he mouths, and a second later, she’s reabsorbed in whatever she was watching.
He turns back to the body double. “She brought up that some people like Jerme might not want to be brought back. At first, I thought she had a point. Then I got to thinking. She told me her stepmom was a psychologist. She wasn’t just any psychologist. After a little research this morning, I discovered she was on San Francisco’s premier morning show with her own segment, Ask Doctor Janet.”
“That’s why she wants to start an advice column,” the body double astutely observes.
“Right.”
“Did you change your mind about the column?” it asks.
“What? No,” he shakes his head. “That’s not the point. I’m trying to say it’s serendipitous that Electra is who I brought back. When Jerme is here, she’ll know how to help me make Jerme happy.”
The body double’s eyes narrow. “So you’re going to tell her?”
“She’ll find out when I activate him. Then Jerme will help me smooth things over.” He huffs, plopping down at the footof the bed. His foot is tapping restlessly. He grabs his knee, willing himself to still. He can handle this. “You’ve studied up on relationships. How upset is she going to be?”
“According to the Respectful and Considerate Conduct Course text, citizens ‘should refrain from lying. Engaging in falsehood may break down trust and stifle open communication between individuals, leading to negative consequences for both parties, such as causing the offended party to make poor choices based on the misinformation. Lying may even cause stress, feelings of guilt, or negative self-talk, effectively lowering one’s self-esteem.’ ”
Damn, that’s what he was afraid of because that’s exactly what’s happening. His lie is leading Electra to believe he’s a better man than he is. That’s why when she’s sitting across the room at her new desk, she keeps stealing glances at him with stars in her eyes. His lie has effectively tricked her into a poor choice: liking him. His guilt is a natural consequence. Ergo, he’s an idiot.
But his proverbial hole is already dug. There’s nothing he can do about it now, and it’s not like he can afford to come clean. He’ll just have to deal with the consequences when they inevitably come. “Great talk. I’m screwed,” he says, effectively ending the conversation.
He didn’t select judgmental, but it seems to be a consequence of the morality trait backfiring because he can feel the manupartner’s narrowed eyes on his back as he slips out to get a little work done to keep himself occupied.
An hour later, Chryl joins him and Electra in the living room, wearing a black pleated skirt, a gray open sweater over a vintage white button-down, and a pair of glasses she doesn’t need. She carries his tablet to the couch and plops onto it, eyeing him as she twirls the end of a pigtail braid. Her attention darts between him and Electra like she’s waiting for something.
“What are you doing, Chryl?” he gives in and asks.
