Page 73 of The Rancher Who Swore Off Love
“After that, I stopped expectin’ things to be good. Every time somethin’ nice happened, I’d just wait for it to fall apart. That’s the one thing bein’ poor teaches you better than anythin’ else.”
He tightened his grip. “And then?”
“Then I came here. And you gave me a kitchen with a stove that works and a baby to hold and a family that argues aboutknots.”
He chuckled. “Theyarepassionate about them.”
“And every single mornin’ I wake up and wait for it to end. For somebody to tell me there’s been a mistake and I gotta go back to the rats and the flour I’d fry on a stove lid because the actual stove had broken.”
“Grace—”
“And tonight you kissed me. And I’m sittin’ next to this pond with your hand in my hand, and I’mterrified, Logan.”
“You don’t have to—”
“Yes, I do.” She gulped. “Because this is the best thing I’ve ever had. And I don’t know how to have it without waitin’ for it to break.”
Logan’s hand let go of hers.
Her stomach lurched, and—
His arm came around her shoulders. Pulled her sideways into his chest and tucked her head under his chin. His other hand pressed hers flat against his ribs, right over his heartbeat.
“I was on the cattle drive when my ma died.” He said it into her hair. “Thomas and me and Pa. Three days out. Got word from a rider. Justyour ranchandyour wife. That’s all it took. We rode two days without sleep.”
His arm tightened.
“She made it to the porch. She’d been in the garden, with her roses, and she saw somethin’. Ran for the house. Almost made it.”
Grace pressed closer.
“I found her boots by the back door. She always kicked ’em off before the garden. Said she liked feelin’ the dirt. So her boots just sat there. Lined up neat, the way she kept everything.”
His jaw worked against the top of her head.
“They sat by that door for six months before Thomas finally put ’em away. And I wanted to hit him for it. Because movin’ the boots meant she wasn’t comin’ back, and as long as they sat there I could still—”
He breathed into her hair.
“I closed the ranch after. Told everybody it served as protection. But the real reason... if I controlled everything, the fences, the gates, who came and went, then I wouldn’t have to stand in a doorway lookin’ at a pair of boots and knowin’ the person who wore ’em was never comin’ home.”
Grace sniffed. “Then I came and—”
“Blew every gate open. Yeah. And I fought you on it ‘cause lettin’ someone in meant—”
“They could leave.”
“Yeah.”
Grace pressed her ear against his chest. His heartbeat filled her head. This was the rhythm she’d been reaching for every night since the first week on the ranch. Not the mantel clock.This.
“I ain’t goin’ anywhere.” She said it against his ribs. “I know you got no reason to believe that.”
“People do leave.”
“My ma left, and your ma left, and the world’s full of empty boots and shawls that smell like the wrong soap.” She crunched her eyes closed. “But I’m not leavin’ this ranch, and I ain’t leavin’ that baby or you.”
He pursed his lips. “Oughtn’t I be higher on the list than the baby?”
