Page 40 of A Wanderer's Redemption
“If you wanted to, why didn’t you just say so?”
“Oh, that’s not my place.”
I practically pick her up out of her seat as I draw her slightly closer than proper, telling myself it will be easier to lead herthrough the steps if she falters, but she easily falls into step with me. The song’s tempo quickens a little, and I loosen my hold so I can twirl her around, only to find her laughter surrounding me.
“Jess, you never fail to surprise me. Where did you learn to dance?”
“Mrs. Marshal had a grandson, a few years younger than me, with what she called two left feet. When his instructor grew tired of trying to teach him, I was chosen to be his partner.”
“Did the young man ever learn?”
“He did, but he always requested that I be his partner for each new dance from that point on. It got me out of some of the housework, and I enjoyed the lessons even if I could have done without the bruised toes. Mrs. Marshal would even have us practice in the evenings if he had an important invitation coming up. I can remember those were the few times I ever saw her smile. I always figured she was reliving her own youth through us.”
I see her glance over my shoulder at Tyberius and Victoria.
“They are the prettiest people I have ever seen, and I swear they look like they are floating above the floor.”
“You can see their years together in their comfortable steps. I hope my wife looks at me the same way Victoria does him after being together for as long as they have.”
“I’m sure if you are half as good to her as you are to me, no woman will ever have a problem loving you, Reggie.”
Her words hit me hard, and I tug her closer as I move through the steps almost absent-mindedly. My mind drifts off with thoughts of the next few months, then to the end of this journey,but the only person I can see when this is all behind me is Jess. The evening ends with the ladies hugging for way too long as Tyberius and I stand back and watch. They both agree to meet us in the morning before we depart, and I know Jessica is sad from the expression on her face as we walk back to our room.
“Why such a long face?”
“I have few friends in this world Reggie, and I hate that I will probably never see Victoria again after tomorrow.”
“Why would you think that?”
Jess pulls away from me, and I instantly miss her small form next to mine. “Oh, Reggie, be realistic. When I take this gorgeous dress off and put my old one back on tomorrow, this fairy tale ends, and all I’ll have left are the memories of a goddess who reached down from the clouds and granted me all my wishes, to get me through the reality of what is left of my life.”
I see tears in her eyes as she pushes past me toward our train car, and I can tell she is trying her hardest to keep her emotions in check. A man steps out of his seat, separating us for a minute, and I lose her as she passes through the door. I ball my fist up, fighting the urge to take my anger out on the one who dared split us up. When I finally catch her, she is standing in front of our door with her hand pressed against her mouth, physically struggling not to break down in the hallway.
Reaching around her, I unlock the door, barely getting it open before she runs through it. Jessica doesn’t say anything else to me, simply pulls the curtain closed between us. But that act alone feels like she has taken a knife to my gut, as her pain is hurting me as well. Deciding to give her some space, I rip off the clothes that suddenly feel like they’re strangling me, only tostop when I hear her sobs from the other side. I’d expected her to calm down as time passed, but she doesn’t, even though she is doing her best to hide the sounds that are practically tearing my heart out.
Grabbing the loose pants I like to sleep in, I don’t ask for permission or hesitate to slide the curtain open. But my heart jerks when I find Jess sitting on the floor in her dressing gown, rubbing the bottom lace of the dark blue dress Victoria gave her.
Sliding my arms under her small frame, I pick her up. Her arms instantly circle my neck as she buries her head against my chest. With one arm, I throw the covers back, lower us both into the bed, then awkwardly pull them over us. Tucking her into my side, I rub her back as the tears continue. I don’t know what else to do at this point, and I have a feeling this is about more than never seeing Victoria again. In her heart, she believes she will once again become the girl she was days ago, and I don’t know how to convince her otherwise. Jess has quickly turned out to be very important to me but because it has happened so fast, I’m fighting with emotions and feelings of my own. I didn’t see her or any woman in my future for quite a while, and I’m struggling to figure out where she fits into the plans I’ve worked so hard on.
After what feels like forever, I feel her body relax as she finally cries herself to sleep. Her body twitches involuntarily with small hiccups as tears dry on her cheeks. She moves closer, her small hand settling over my heart, and I lay mine over hers as I lie here awake, my thoughts scattered everywhere. I barely hold back a chuckle when I realize I have spent more time in her small bed than I have in my own.
For once, I wish I could sneak into Mom and Dad’s room and talk to them like I did when I was a kid. Even though my thoughts are disorganized, I wonder what Mom would think ofJessica. Just as my eyes begin to close, I swear I hear my mom’s voice in my head.
“Some things, especiallylove, do not follow the rules, Reggie.Some thingsjust are, so can you be strong enough to see her as more than whatshe was?Some thingsare easier to leave behind if you don’t carry them with you.”
CHAPTER 16
JESSICA
The train wheels screeching to a stop wakes me up. Without realizing it, I reach over to the other side of the bed only to find it cold, but I can tell by the imprint in the pillow that Reggie stayed with me all night. The curtain has been pulled closed, so I make myself get up and dress, because no matter how much I didn’t want yesterday to end, the light of a new day came anyway.
After pulling my old dress on, which now feels ill-fitting and scratchy, I carefully pack away the delicate dresses that Victoria gave me in the luggage she insisted I would need to store them properly. Wiping a tear off my cheek, I take a deep breath, refusing to cry any longer. My eyes are already puffy and sore from falling apart yesterday. The only thing that brings a small smile to my face is the fact that Reggie didn’t allow me to suffer alone, and he didn’t force me to talk about it … he just held me.
When the last of my bags is packed, I open the curtain, finding that all of Reggie’s are stacked next to the door, so he must have been up for a while. Heading to the washroom, I quickly take care of business, then splash some cool water on my face. When I look up into the mirror, all I see is the same face I’ve lookedat all my life, and I wonder if the last few days even happened. I’ve no idea how long I stand there, but hearing the door open, I straighten my dress and pat down the stray hairs that are already trying to escape my braid before walking out, only to stop dead in my tracks.
“Heavens, Reggie! If I hadn’t seen all your hair under that cowboy hat, I would’ve been scared half to death. You look like a completely different person.”
“Well Jess, you didn’t expect me to wear a suit on the trail, did you?”
