Page 19 of Broken Silence
I wasn’t less because I had been abused… but sometimes those old feelings were hard to shake.
“You deserve someone who wasn’t dir—”
“Do not finish that sentence,” he interrupted, the dangerous edge back in his voice.
He took three long breaths, and I wanted to crawl inside myself.
I’d worked hard for years to accept that I was worthy of love and a normal life. I wasn’t going to let myself take any steps backwards, but I wanted Cole to understand every reason I had for leaving him. It took a hell of a lot of work to accept myself.
“Look at me, Oakley.”
I did what he asked, my gaze sliding over his chest and up into his striking blue eyes, where he stared into mine like no time had passed at all.
The familiar heat flooded my cheeks and stomach, the need to feel his skin against mine and his taste on my tongue strong.
The hard line of his jaw disappeared. “What happened wasn’t your fault.”
“I know that, but I can’t help how it made me feel.”
“You—”
“Cole, please. I can’t talk about this now.”
I was just about holding it together, seeing him after four years and havingthatconversation was getting too much. I hadn’t prepared to talk about what’d happened to me, and I wasn’t at the point where I could just jump into it.
“Okay,” he said.
“I’m so sorry. I didn’t want to… I thought I was doing the best thing.”
“You know how many times I wanted to come out there?” He ran his hands through his hair, lightly tugging at the strands. “I shouldn’t have listened to you. I tried to date again, but I compared every woman to you, and no one ever came close. It’s fucking annoying. I’m just as stuck as you are.”
“I’m so sorry,” I repeated.
“Doesn’t matter anymore.”
That was a terrible lie. It mattered now more than ever. “Don’t say that.”
He scrubbed his hands over his face. “I can’t do this, Oakley. You blindsided me, and I don’t know what to think. It’s too much.” Standing to leave, he took one last look at me and asked, “Do you regret not letting me come with you?”
“Every day.”
“Good,” he replied.
And then I watched him walk away.
Chapter 4
Cole
Iwalked back into the house in a daze, leaving the door open, not knowing what was going on. She washere, in my house, and I’d had no warning.
When my eyes landed on her for the first time, my body screamed to hold her, I ached to pull her into my arms, and I’d only just been able to conjure enough self-control to keep my hands to myself.
There was so much more I needed to say. I wanted to shout and make her fucking see that she was wrong. She was the one who did that to us.
The back door opened, and she came into the house, dressed in my hoodie. Part of me was around her again, and it was doing nothing to calm the hammering in my chest.
Mum smiled at me, silently asking how I was.
