Page 93 of Beautiful Chaos
“And what are your thoughts on Silas now? Do you view him as a dangerous person? In your experience, does Silas struggle to control his impulses?”
Edison has never been one to take offense easily. It’s amusing,despite the circumstances, to see him shake off the annoyance and square his shoulders.
“Apologies, Edison,” Indaja says, looking mildly amused. “I didn’t mean to impugn your training.”
Slightly mollified, Edison says, “Thank you. And to answer your question, Silas has proven himself again and again. His control is impeccable.” He taps the table. “I’d have to look at his files, but I don’t believe Silas has experienced a loss of control since he was…seventeen? Maybe eighteen?”
Silas ducks his chin.
“In those moments where Sy did lose control, was anyone ever harmed or killed as a result?”
Edison grimaces, but before anyone can jump to the wrong conclusion, he’s quick to clarify, “Understand that, from the beginning of puberty, killing people was a critical part of his training.”
Even the small, ambient sounds in the room go quiet on those words. Everyone sits with this heavy, immutable fact.
“But even when things went sideways, he never took an unsanctioned life.” Edison huffs out a short laugh. “The only person he ever really took a swipe at was me, and as everyone in this room knows, I can take it.”
“So he never harmed a child? An animal?”
“No. As soon as he understood there was a better way, he did everything he could to be…” Edison sighs. “Good.”
His voice breaks on that last word. Ronan shifts in his seat.
“Edison, you are not somebody I know to be particularly emotional. What about Silas is making you emotional now?”
“He tries to be good even though he doesn’t believe he can be good.”
“Oh?”
Edison takes a long look at Silas, whose chin is to his chest. Edison’s expression creases, but he holds himself together.
“Silas believes he is evil. To his core. Yet he still tries to be good.” Edison lets out a frustrated breath. “If I failed at anything, it is that I could never convince him that he has always beengood.”
Oakley presses against Silas. He hesitates, then takes his hand. Silas turns, resting his forehead on Oakley’s shoulder, and Oakley looks relieved as he places a kiss on Sy’s head.
RONAN AND THANE
Indaja turns her attention to the other side of the room. Ronan and Thane have tears in their eyes.
She’s gentle as she says, “Ant, Erik, and Edison have worked more closely with Silas than anyone else, and they trust him implicitly.” She gives a small shrug. “That doesn’t mean you have to immediately have that same level of trust. But if you were willing to try, what would you need to see from him? Is there anything Silas could do to make you know he would never harm your son?”
Ronan stays quiet. Processing.
After a moment, Thane speaks up. “We’ve already seen that Silas enjoys killing the bad guys. Which”—he laughs to himself—“is kind of on brand with the Wimberley operation.”
His small joke dismantles some of the tension in the room.
Thane continues, “But I’ve rewatched the footage from the first op Oakley went on. It was clear from the beginning that Silas wasn’t just having fun. He was never going to allow Oakley to be harmed.”
“I would rip the head off anyone who tried to harm Oakley,” Silas says, his quiet words echoing.
Indaja taps her forehead. “Silas, I know you’re trying to help here, but…”
Ronan shocks the room by speaking. “Actually, that is helpful.” He lets out a long, slow breath. “Our son is large and strong and fully capable of defending himself. But he’s a lover, not a fighter. Our very ownFerdinand the Bull.”
Ronan and Oakley share a smile.
“Ferdinand the Bullwas Oakley’s favorite childhood story,” Thane explains softly. “For fairly obvious reasons.”
