Page 3 of Speechless
I sank down on my haunches at the side of that old red building, not caring that the cars driving in and out of the adjoining parking lot could see me. Crouching down was a hell of a lot better than falling down because my legs couldn’t support me anymore.
Curling my hands around my throbbing head, wishing for just one more drink to take the edge off, I did something I hadn’t done in years. I prayed. I prayed for an escape route to open up. And if it didn’t… I prayed for the strength to stay and fight.
Trey sat down beside me on the pavement. “Feeling helpless has gotta be one of the worst feelings in the world, huh? Almost as bad as feeling like an inmate in a prison you created.”
There was a reason Trey was one of the best songwriters in our business. He had a way with words that no one else did. He could get to the crux of it, let people know that as bad as they were feeling, he’d been there. And came out the other side. It gave his fans… and me… hope.
“That’s one way of putting it,” I said, trying to push the words out even though it felt like my throat was closing up.
“But here’s the thing, you have a lot more control than you think.”
“I don’t think so.” The bottle ruled my life. It dictated how I felt about myself and everyone around me. It was my medicine and my poison. I needed it… and hated myself for not being able to live without it.
“I know it doesn’t feel that way now, but it will. You didn’t commit a crime, man. You’re not locked up in maximum security prison to rot. You still have free will, and the power to choose to make your life better. To go after your dream.”
He was starting to sound like my high school football coach, the only other man who’d ever believed in me. “It’s not that easy, Trey. If it were, I would have done it by now.”
He chuckled. “You’re preaching to the choir, my friend. No one knows better than I do how hard it is, but I got through it and you will too.”
I shook my head. “You had Sierra, Marisa, Luc, your folks—” I had my band and my kid brother. I’d already alienated everyone else in my life who’d ever given a shit about me. “It’s not like that for me.”
“Those people in there will become like your family. And you’ve got your band, me, Luc, your brother, we’re all here for you, Mav. All you have to do is take the first step and if you need back-up, all you need to do is say the word.”
This felt like my shot. It was weird because I knew I could have walked into a meeting room any day of my life, but being here withtheTrey Turner by my side made this feel like a now or never moment. I could chase the future I wanted or let my demons go on chasing me. Didn’t feel like much of a choice.
I drew a deep breath, followed by another, before I pushed to my feet. “Okay, let’s do this.”
Trey slapped me on the back, grinning. “Best decision you ever made, buddy.”
I sure as hell hoped so, ‘cause up to this point my life had just been one bad decision after another.
ChapterTwo
Codie
My stomach bottomed out when my past walked into my safe haven, looking like a strung-out version of the boy I used to love.
What the hell was Maverick Stone doing here? And with Trey Turner, no less. This had to be some kind of sick, cosmic joke, and I’d had enough of those to last a lifetime.
I listened to the meeting leader welcome everyone while Mav’s gaze travelled around the room before finally landing on me. Trey was talking in his ear, but he appeared speechless. And I could relate. When our eyes connected for the first time in fifteen years it felt like someone sucked all of the oxygen out of the room.
“Oh my God,” my friend, Amanda, whispered. “Do you know who that is?”
“Yeah, Trey Turner.” We’d been born and raised in Nashville. There wasn’t a person in this town who didn’t know who Trey was.
“Yeah, and do you know who’s with him? Maverick Stone!”
“Sssh.” I looked around to make sure no one had overheard us before I said, “I know who he is.”
I knew him well enough to want to forget him. He’d been my first love. The boy who claimed my virginity the night of our junior prom. The guy who sent me off to college with a kiss on the forehead, promising to call, but he never did. The bastard just disappeared on me after two years of dating. I couldn’t claim he’d been the one to drive me to drink, but I’d partied hard trying to forget him.
“I tried to get tickets to their concert while they were in town, but they sold out in no time.” She sighed. “Think they’ll add more dates?”
“I don’t know.” As long as Mav was Trey’s opening act, I had no interest taking in a show. Watching my ex flirt with all the pretty girls in the first row wasn’t exactly my idea of a good time.
“Hey, did you hear from that music producer you went out with last week?” she asked, studying her nude manicure.
“Yeah, he wants to take me out again on Saturday.”
