Page 71 of Speechless
She frowned before shaking her head. “No way. I can’t do that. I’d be happy to set you up with—”
“I need you.”
Codie closed her eyes and I took a step closer. “Please don’t do this.”
I pulled a red chip out of my pocket, holding it up for her to see. We both knew what it represented. Ninety days of sobriety.
Her smile was faint when she said, “Congratulations, I’m proud of you.”
I took another step closer. “I miss you so much, girl. It’s killin’ me.”
I thought of all the sleepless nights, missed meals, texts never sent, drinks poured down the drain, tears, songs written, and none of that could have prepared me for the way my stomach twisted standing so close to her but not being allowed to touch her.
“I miss you too.” Her gaze started at my motorcycle boots and slowly travelled up until they landed on my eyes. “You look good. Too damn good.”
I smirked. “You too.” It killed me to ask, but I had to know. “Have you been seeing anyone?”
“Don’t ask me that.”
“So, you have?” I’d tortured myself, imagining her laughing, kissing, making love… falling in love with someone who could make her forget all about me.
“We’re not having this conversation, Mav.”
I didn’t come here today expecting her to take me back. I was still only three months into my sobriety, and the ground under my feet felt like quicksand most days. I needed to feel more stable before I could start making promises to her. Because this time I’d die before I broke them.
I took a chance and moved in closer, bracing my fists on her desk, on either side of her. “Just tell me if you’ve slept with anyone else.”
Her face was inches from mine when she said, “You’re such an asshole.”
“Yeah, I am. But I’m still not low enough to kiss another man’s girlfriend, so now would be a good time to stop me if—”
“Shut up and kiss me.”
I kept my hands firmly planted because I knew if I didn’t, the first taste of her lips would send me over the edge. Three months of abstinence seemed like a small price to pay when the reward was Codie.
She slipped her tongue past the seam of my lips and my body ignited. I was plunging deeper, she was locking her booted feet around my legs, digging her high heels into my thighs and I was thirty seconds away from clearing her desk and getting her naked right there.
But she pushed me away and covered her mouth. “Jesus.” Her breathing was labored as she stared at me, wide-eyed. “How the hell do you do that to me? It’s like you flip a switch and I’m a different person.”
“Answer my question, Codie.” My eyes drifted to her moist lips. “I need to know.”
“No, I haven’t been with anyone else. Are you satisfied?”
“Yes.” I knew I had no right to ask her to wait for me, but the fact she hadn’t been with anyone else gave me hope.
“You?”
I shook my head. “You’re it for me, baby. It’s you or nobody.”
She sighed. “Why are we torturing each other this way?”
“It’s not torture.” I rested my palm against her cheek and she closed her eyes, turning into my touch. “It’s laying the foundation for forever.”
She finally opened her eyes and said, “I’ve got to get back to work. What kind of tattoo were you thinking about getting?”
I pulled the sheet of paper out of the pocket of my denim jacket and handed it to her, feeling a fresh wave of fear, I could only compare to releasing a new song and wondering whether fans would embrace or reject it.
Her sharp intake of breath before her eyes finally rested on mine still left me guessing.
