Page 52 of Speechless
But I wouldn’t know unless I faced these issues head-on. So, I dug deep, allowing myself to be vulnerable, and admit that I was a little jealous and insecure.
“Does it ever get old?” I asked, trying to keep it light. “Having gorgeous women throwing themselves at you? Asking you to take them home?”
He winced before his hands slid lower, gliding over the base of my spine. “You heard that, huh?”
“More than a few times. You must get that every night, though.”
He looked into my eyes, obviously wanting me toseethe truth when he spoke. “I do, but not one of them are you, so the answer will always be a hard no.”
“Good to know.”
“Codie, look at me.”
I didn’t realize my gaze had landed on his chest until he implored me to make eye contact. “Yes?”
“You’re it for me, girl. I don’t know how long it’ll take me to convince you of that, and I don’t care. I’ll keep trying, for as long as it takes, to make you believe you can trust me. I’m not that same dumb kid who broke your heart all those years ago.”
“I know.”
“Do you?” When I didn’t respond right away, he said, “You have every right to be cautious, to demand that I prove myself, earn your trust. And I will.”
I nodded, wondering why the hell he was so determined to win me over when he could have any woman he wanted. Did he just want to re-write history, to make up for the mistakes he’d made with me so he could finally release the guilt?
He leaned in, whispering in my ear, “You don’t believe me, do you?”
Truth. Vulnerability. Those two words echoed in my head and I knew they would be my mantra if I chose to continue this crazy ride with my ex. “I want to, but can I say, one hundred percent, without a doubt, that I do? No, not yet.”
“That’s fair. I wouldn’t expect you to be all in, yet. Too much has happened between us. But as long as you’re not determined to slam the door in my face, I’ll keep trying until I prove myself to you. I won’t give up on us, baby. Not this time.”
I didn’t want him to give up on me. I wanted him to give me time to figure this out, to let me fall in love with him all over again, and believe that I finally could trust him with my heart, for keeps, this time.
“Can I take you home tonight?”
I had a moment’s hesitation but my heart screamed…Yes!…even before the words left my lips. “Yes.”
His mega-watt grin made a rare appearance before he dipped his head and brushed his lips against mine. “I won’t make you regret it. I promise.”
ChapterFifteen
Maverick
We’d decided to spend the night at Codie’s place, since she wanted to return all of her gear to her shop before we called it a night.
But once we’d crossed the threshold of her renovated loft and locked the door, I could tell she was nervous. Trying to give her a little space, I wandered around her place. Large, open-concept, high ceilings, reclaimed wood and brick. Stainless appliances with smooth dark countertops and soft lighting. It screamed Codie, and I loved the cool, relaxed, vibe. Hopefully, she’d let me spend a lot of time here once I got off the road.
“This place is amazing,” I said, accepting the bottle of water she offered, with a nod of thanks.
I walked to the bank of floor-to-ceiling, wrap-around windows. The city lights lit up the dark night, reminding me how beautiful the skyline, and our hometown was. This place had a lot of bad memories for me, but I’d been half-way around the world the past few years and Nashville was still the only place I wanted to call home.
“Thanks.” She stepped up beside me. “I poured a lot of sweat equity and every dime I had into it, but it was worth it. It’s the only place that’s ever felt like home. Maybe because it’s the only place that’s ever been mine.”
Codie was so damn independent. I loved that about her. But I wondered how we could mesh our two worlds if she was so determined to cling to hers.
“What are you thinking?” she asked, tipping her head to study me. “And don’t tell me nothing. I know you. My mind may have forgotten for a while but my heart can read you like a book I memorized years ago.”
“Damn.” I smiled. “That’s poetic. Mind if I use that? It’d make a great song lyric.”
She grinned. “Sure, but only if you give me credit.”
