Page 32 of Speechless
“I can’t believe you two.”
I tried to remember how to breathe when Mav stepped off his bus and exchanged a few words with one of the security guards posted outside. His hair was damp, like he’d just gotten out of the shower and he was wearing faded jeans and a Rolling Stones t-shirt with black motorcycle boots.
His eyes found mine and I didn’t see the guy who’d just been entertaining a capacity crowd like he’d been doing it all his life. I saw the guy who’d made love to me on an air mattress in a tent, promising to love me forever. The man was a mirage, fading into the boy. And I couldn’t tell them apart anymore. Old Mav. New Mav. Who could I trust?
“You okay?” Amanda leaned in, whispering in my ear. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
I had, the ghost of my past love. It was a visceral reaction. I could feel it from the tips of my toes to the top of my head, rendering me speechless as the energy moved through my body in a whoosh. What the hell was happening to me? If I didn’t know better, I’d think I was about to stroke out.
Before I could respond, Mav walked towards us. He pulled his brother into a hug, and exchanged a few pleasantries with Amanda, before turning to me.
I shocked myself by stepping into his arms without a word. It took half a second for him to close his arms around me as I rested my head on his shoulder. We were the only two people there in that moment. Everyone else had faded away as I was transported back in time, to the way Mav made me feel when we were young. Safe. Protected. Loved. Hopeful.
“Um, I guess we’ll be going,” Amanda said. “I’ll catch up with you at the hotel later, Codie.”
I was still hiding my face in his chest as I nodded, not even sparing her a backwards glance. I couldn’t. I was too embarrassed and ashamed and confused to face anyone now.
“Let’s go inside the bus,” Mav whispered in my ear.
“Your band—”
“They’re all staying at a hotel tonight. They had family in from out of town and wanted time alone with them.”
I didn’t know if I should be relieved or concerned we’d be all alone, but I didn’t have time to think about it as he ushered me onto the luxury bus. It wasn’t as large as the two buses parked behind it, which presumably belonged to Trey and his band, but it was seriously impressive for a kid who’d grown up in a run-down shack on the wrong side of the city.
“This is nice,” I said, running my hand over the polished stone counter in the small kitchen.
“Thanks.” He grinned. “Our first big investment when we realized this tour was really going to happen. We’re just leasing it of course, but—” He shrugged. “It works for us.”
“You were amazing tonight,” I said, turning to face him. “Trey too, of course.”
“Trey’s a pro. Never seen him put on a bad show, even when he’s feeling like shit.”
I nodded. “It seems like Amanda and your brother really hit it off.”
“I know.” He chuckled. “Noah texted me, thanking me for sitting him next to your friend. He said she was a smokeshow.”
I grinned. “Pretty sure the feeling was mutual. Not even sure she’ll be back to the hotel tonight.”
“Don’t worry about Noah. He’s a gentleman.”
“I know, I’m not worried.” My friend didn’t get her heart broken easily. She’d learned not to expect much from men, and was never disappointed. I’d thought I learned the same lesson, the hard way, yet here I was with Mav again.
“Good.” He gestured to the small fridge behind me. “Help yourself to water or a soft drink. Or I can make some coffee?”
“I’m good, thanks.” It was a spacious bus, but being alone in it with Mav made it feel like the size of a closet. He was sucking all of the oxygen out of the space, making it tough for me to breathe. “I am kind of tired though. Maybe I should head back to the hotel.”
He opened his mouth, then closed it, and I knew he wanted to object. “Okay, just let me give my security a heads up and I’ll walk you back. Is it far from here?”
“About a ten-minute walk.”
“Okay, no point getting an Uber then.” He slipped past me, making his way to the door. “Just give me a minute.”
When he was finally outside, I could breathe. I drew deep gulping breaths as I tipped my head back and closed my eyes. I chastised myself for slipping into his arms like I belonged there, but I was grateful he hadn’t called me out about it.
He stuck his head inside the door. “Uh, I hope you don’t mind if we have an escort?”
“An escort?”
