Page 37 of Payback
Loran grinned, thinking it would nice to have this guy as his brother-in-law someday.
***
Bella couldn’t explain how she’d ended up at the hospice on her lunch break, but she made the excuse of bringing Loran’s favorite patient a sandwich from the corner deli.
Stella’s eyes lit up and she clapped her hands when she saw her. “You came back to see me!”
“I sure did.” She handed over the brown paper bag with a smile. “Hope you like pastrami?”
“Are you kidding? I love it! Thank you, dear.”
To Bella it was just a sandwich, but to her new friend it seemed a reason to rejoice. “My pleasure. I’m glad you haven’t had lunch yet.”
Stella wrinkled her nose. “They were serving beef stew. Not my favorite.”
Pulling up the chair beside her, Bella said, “But you know you have to eat, right? Keep your strength up.”
Stella’s look was so earnest that Bella’s heart skipped a beat. “It won’t make a difference whether I eat or not.”
“Don’t say that.” It broke Bella’s heart to think every one of the people under this roof had been handed a death sentence. It wasn’t a matter of if, but when, they would die.
“Doctors say—”
“Doctors don’t know everything.” Bella smiled as the older woman nodded thoughtfully before unwrapping the sandwich and taking a bite.
“I suppose you’re right. They’ve been wrong before, haven’t they?”
“And they could be wrong this time.” Bella didn’t know the nature of Stella’s illness. She only knew there wasn’t an illness that hadn’t miraculously been cured. “We have to believe that.”
“Either way, I’m content.” At Bella’s questioning look, she smiled. “I’ve had a wonderful life. If God decides it’s time for me to go, so be it.”
Bella couldn’t imagine finding peace in death. But she hadn’t lived as long. Maybe it was true what they said about age and wisdom. “Really?”
She nodded. “I was just writing in my journal the other day…” She paused while taking another bite. “Do you keep a journal?”
“No.”
“You should.” Her eyes twinkled when she smiled. “It’s cheaper than therapy.”
Bella laughed. “I guess it is.”
“Anyways, I was writing about that very thing: peace and contentment. I’m happy.” She looked out the window at the bird feeder that had been placed outside the window for residents to enjoy. I don’t know how many days I have left, but I give thanks for every one. I may not have the strength I used to have, but I do what I can and always find reasons to be grateful.”
Bella felt a little breathless as she listened to this woman, who was coming to terms with the end of her life, talk about peace and contentment and happiness. In the same position she expected she’d be experiencing fear and sadness and resentment.
“You look surprised.”
“Do I?” Bella shook her head. “I guess I am. I’ve never known anyone who looks at things the way you do.” Her parents had raised her to be grateful for the big things, like having a roof over her head and food in her belly, but she’d never considered how being grateful for all the little things might change her life and perspective.
“I think that’s why Loran likes to talk to me.” She wiped her dry lips with the paper napkin the deli provided before Bella uncapped the bottled water she’d stuck in her oversized purse and handed it to her. “I get him thinking about things he never has before.”
“I can certainly see that.”
“He’s been so focused on his career for so long,” Stella said, her gaze drifting to the window. “He hasn’t taken time to think about the things that really matter. Being famous, making a lot of money, that’s fleeting.”
“I don’t know,” Bella said, charmed by her opinion. “Some ball players’ careers last a long time.”
“Yeah, but what do they have to show for it when it’s all over?” She sighed. “A pile of money and some flashy mementoes?”
