Page 35 of Running
“I’m memorizing all the new plays,” I explain. “Drawing them out myself so they really stick in my head.”
He nods. I did the same thing at Alabama. “So, you okay?”
“Yes, thankfully my ass took the brunt of the fall. It’s a little sore, but I’ll be fine.”
Landon knows I’d shoot straight with him if I wasn’t alright. We’ve never hidden things in our friendship, even the darker or salacious issues.
Well, other than that one night during Grace’s spring break trip.
A thought which, sitting here, triggers my unease at how things are playing out with Gracenow.
We’re texting.
We’re sharing personal details about ourselves.
She’s coming to my house on Sunday, alone.
And I’m so fucking attracted to her, it hurts.
It was so much easier when she was avoiding me. But that’s not where things stand now. To be honest, I don’t want them to go back.
And while I’m dancing on a thin tightrope of permissible behavior with Grace, Landon’s concerns about some guy taking advantage of her—that type of scenario isnotwhat’s floating around in my mind.
Instead, the compulsion I’m fighting is simpler…
I just want to be around her. Kiss her—eventually more physically, sure—but I also want to bewithher. Talk, get to know her better, spend time together.
One challenge is that if Landon knew I was into her, I don’t think he’d believe I have her best interests at heart. He knows too much about all the years I’ve messed around with women casually. In fact, that’s theonlybehavior with women he knows from me.
Of course, I’ve never told him about the night with Grace in college, and I’ve forgiven myself for that, mostly. The screwed up part is that it’s exactly the behavior he would probably expect from me now, today.
All of this adds up to a healthy dose of guilt and discomfort.
Buzzzzz.My phone goes off on the desk, and since only people who know me have my cell, I go check the message.
BAILEY: You think Landon’s seen this?
Landon’s still standing here in my room, chatting away. What’s going on?
I open Bailey’s text and—shit. Attached is a link to an article fromFirst and Tenmagazine about Rawley, insinuating he’s a screw-up at school, even while continuing to dominate on the field.
The headline is RAWLEY BATTLE – UNLIMITED PROMISE OR HUGE LIABILITY. Accompanied by a photo where he looks like he’s high as a kite. Not good.
I quickly text the link to Grace with a message—“with Landon if you want us to call”—and then interrupt Landon.
“I hate this, man. But I need to show you something.”
As he reads the piece, he begins to flip out. “This kid, I swear to god. He’s going to screw up his whole future.”
I try to keep a glimmer of hope alive. “Don’t jump to conclusions. You know how pictures can be manipulated.”
Suddenly, my phone is ringing.Oh shit.It’s Grace. I quickly mention to Landon that I texted her about the article before accepting her call.
“Hi Grace, putting you on the speaker with Landon.”
Landon looks confused. “Wait, why are you texting each other?”
You don’t have any reason to feel bad,I tell myself.Nothing’s happened…well, since college anyways…and you have her number because of the auction.
