Page 64 of Colt
The world went very still.
I stared at them—these two perfect boys with their green eyes and stubborn jaws, my sons who’d spent weeks looking at me with suspicion and fear—and tried to process what they’d just said.
“You…” My voice came out rough. “You told your class I was your dad?”
“Youareour daddy.” Knox said it like it was obvious. “That’s what Mama said. And you’ve been here every day. You taught us to ride. You helped Luca when he got in trouble, and—” He shrugged. “You’re our daddy.”
I turned away, one hand coming up to cover my face. I was not going to cry in front of my sons. I was not going to—
“Colt?” Luca’s voice was uncertain. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah.” The word came out strangled. “Yeah, I’m okay. I just—” I had to stop, had to breathe, had to get myself under control. “I’ve been waiting a long time to hear that.”
“Hear what?” Knox moved closer, his small hand finding mine. “That you’re our dad?”
“That you want me to be.” I finally turned back to face them, not bothering to hide the tears tracking down my cheeks.
Knox leaned toward his brother. “Mama said he’d like to hear this,” he whispered—loudly enough that I could hear every word. “She didn’t say he’d cry.”
Luca elbowed him. “Shh.”
“I know I wasn’t here before. I know I missed so much. And I know I was mean to your mama when we first met. I never—” My voice broke. “I never expected you to forgive me for that. To accept me.”
Luca was quiet for a moment, studying me with those eyes that mirrored my own. Then, slowly, he stepped forward. “You’re different now,” he said. “From how you were at the store. You’re nice to Mama. You show up when you say you will. You—” He hesitated. “You listen to us. Like what we say matters.”
“It does matter. Everything you say matters to me.”
“So.” Luca glanced at Knox, then back at me. “So yeah. You’re our dad.”
Knox threw himself at me, wrapping his arms around my waist. After a moment’s hesitation, Luca did the same.
I gathered them both in my arms. “I love you,” I said, the words tearing out of me. “Both of you. I know I haven’t earned the right to say that yet, but I do. I love you so much.”
“We know.” Knox’s voice was muffled against my chest. “That’s why you keep coming back.”
“We love you too,” Luca said.
?
Later, after the boys had gone to do homework and I’d pulled myself together enough to function, I found Lilac on the back porch.
She was sitting on the steps, watching the sun set over Betty’s garden, a mug of tea cradled in her hands. The evening light caught her hair, turning it bronze. I stood there for a moment, just watching her, memorizing the curve of her profile, the way her shoulders had finally relaxed after weeks of carrying tension.
I sat down beside her—not too close, respecting the boundary we’d established, but close enough that I could smell her shampoo.
She didn’t look up when I sat, but she didn’t move away either. And maybe I was reading too much into it, but her breathing seemed to change slightly. Quicken. Like she was aware of me the way I was aware of her.
“Thank you,” I said. “For letting them… for not poisoning them against me.”
“I would never do that.” She took a sip of her tea, and I watched her throat move as she swallowed. Watched the way her fingers tightened on the mug. “Whatever happens between us, you’re their father. They deserve to know you.”
“A lot of women wouldn’t feel that way. After what I did.”
She was quiet for a moment. When she spoke, her voice was measured, like she’d been sitting with this and had decided to say it.
“What did you really do, Colt?” She wasn’t accusing. She was asking. “You were lied to. By people you trusted. Peoplewho were supposed to be your brothers.” She set down her mug. “They showed you fabricated evidence, forged my name on divorce papers while I was still in a coma. You didn’t leave me. You were deceived into believing a lie.”
“I should have known—”
